Let's start with the cute customer incident.
A while ago I decided that cute customer and I want very different things. I tried to naturally let things cool off when I was super busy, but it turns out he was sweet and understanding about me being too busy to hang out.
Hm. Crap. I had planned to have an adult conversation and explain that it just wasn't working for me, but... then he did something that made the conversation very different than I expected.
Friday evening I was pretty pooped. I was hanging out in bed in the early evening and fell asleep. I woke up to my doorbell ringing. Not a single ring. I woke up to someone repeatedly pushing the button at a fast pace. Followed by pounding on the door.
In a half-awake state, that is jarring and scary. I laid in bed for a minute, heard the person try the door handle, then the commotion at the front door stopped. I grabbed my phone and saw that cute customer had called several times and left text messages.
It was him at my door.
...the calls and texts had started an hour and a half earlier.
The next thing I know, he's in my backyard knocking at my bedroom window. I know the gate was locked so he must have had to jump the fence. Terrified, I decided to call the cops. But before I could, Helen called to discuss house stuff. I told her what was going on and she immediately headed over.
While I was still on the phone with her, I opened the door and told him to leave. To my surprise, he was holding a bottle of wine. He looked surprised and hurt when I told him to leave.
He didn't leave. He hung out on the front porch until Helen arrived. Then he got into his car but still didn't leave. So she turned her brights on and moved her car closer to his. Only then did he drive away.
I got into Helen's car and spent the night with her.
I did talk to him, and it turns out, he was trying to be sweet and surprise me with a bottle of wine because he knew I'd been stressed out. He wasn't trying to murder me, I guess.
He apologized but that was an absolute backfire, dude.
First of all, he came over uninvited and violated some big personal boundaries. That's a big NO. If I wanted company, I would have invited him over.
Second of all, once he knocked and I didn't answer, he should have left. In what scenario is it okay to pound on my door for 90 minutes and go into my backyard?? SO CREEPY! I really thought he'd lost his mind and that I was in danger.
The icing on the cake- when I told him to leave, he didn't leave.
I felt disrespected, like my privacy was violated. I felt unsafe in my own home. I was so freaked out that I spent that next night at Ashley's.
This is the exact reason why I decided not to let anyone I date know where I live. But I made an exception because I knew I'd be moving soon.
LESSON LEARNED.
Omg no. I was hoping for some cute romantic gesture, but as soon as you got to repeated doorbell ringing and pounding I was freaked - let alone the rest of it. Serious yikes.
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