progress

Yesterday I took my faucet apart to fix it. I had it all apart when I realized I hadn't brushed my teeth or washed my face yet. So I put it back together.

It doesn't leak anymore. I didn't change out any of the parts. Hm... Okay!

We got the grass painted in Calvin's room, which we were both nervous about free-handing, but it turned out okay! Then Ash put the border up, and I made the curtains. We tried to put up the curtain rod, but were unable to get the damn screws in the wall. I tried using Collin's power drill, but I only succeeded in putting dents in the wall. So we taped them up to get the effect.

I can't wait to get the animals on the walls, and get some furniture in there! It's going to be such a cute boy's room. It's hard to believe there will be a baby living in there in a few months. Gah! Being an aunt is going to be so much fun.

I didn't get anything done that I needed to get done yesterday because of that headache. It's looming, but hopefully I can knock some stuff out before it's back again. Like the damn ever-present sink full of dishes.

magic pills

Dear headache/ migraine/ monster,
I know you're doing your best to ruin my life, but I have Wal-phed magic pills with the good stuff in it that you have to swipe your driver's license for. So you can go ahead and suck on that while I go about my day.
You fucker.

-Jen

Things.

I had a dream last night that somebody took my nail polish mid-manicure and I was pissed. I ran around bitching at everyone trying to find it. I never did find it.

No matter how careful I am, pancake syrup always seems to end up everywhere.

Going to fix my leaky bathroom faucet while dad is gone. If I try to fix it when he's here he'll notice and get mad because I won't do it right-- even though I have this internet tutorial to follow. It's been dripping for months and he's not fixing it and it's getting on my nerves. Here's hoping I don't make it worse...

This

looks cool. Can you imagine a whole field or patch of this?

Been randomly catching a lot of Friends episodes lately. I love the ones where Monica and Chandler have their secret relationship.

I love chevron anything right now. Just yes.

Getting into the baby mindset again. Painting, curtains, bunting, baby shower... it's happening.

beam

Today, I had to work late to help fix something that hadn't gone quite right. It was all computer stuff, so I mostly gave feedback and did a little bit of testing while the computer people worked on it.They all worked remotely, so we communicated via phone and email.

At one point, the computer lady (who I'd heard was a bit of a hardass) made a little conversation while we were waiting on something to run. She said that she'd heard from my boss that I was new to this particular area of testing. I said yes, that was true. Then she said, "Well you're doing quite well."

I can't even tell you how I beamed at myself from the inside. You go, me.

I've been feeling rather under-used since I'm still technically learning, even after a month. You know I'm itching to start my own projects.

I could sense the computer lady's apprehension about working with me, since this is really my coworker's project and they've communicated extensively about it for months. I also felt somewhat responsible for the problem, even though I was just a bystander and was attempting to help pick up the pieces. So it felt really good to have her warm up to me, and have her say something like that.

I gotta say, I left feeling pretty darn good.

mess & mis

So many leaves... those stinking things are everywhere. Pumpkin keeps playing with them. All I keep hearing is "rustle rustle." (At least I hope it's Pumpkin....)

I'm kinda ready to go back to work. I've had enough of being a slothful boozy glutton. My body is crying out for a vegetable that's not wrapped in bacon.

Les Mis was awesome. Of course I think Anne Hathaway can do no wrong, so that pretty much made it for me right there. I made it through to the end without tears, but then I forgot about Fantine popping up at the last scene and that notion went out the window. Not a dry eye in the house. We all filed out of the theatre in a crowd of sniffles.There were a few people whining about how it dragged on, and a few bored kids. As Suzy put it, "It's a damn musical about the French Revolution. What did you expect?"

Since I've just seen the Broadway version, I could not help but make comparisons. Most notably, Eponine didn't win me over in the movie, but when we saw it in November, her "On My Own" damn near brought you chills. A few small differences here and there, but overall they are both enjoyable. I will be purchasing the DVD and I'd go see the Broadway version again. I'm officially one of those people who loves Les Miserables.

Parentals leave for the Ukraine today. They were up at the crack of dawn all excited. They're running around not knowing what to do with themselves.

I'm just sitting here drinking coffee, ignoring the huge mess on the floor.

gifty

Man. My cell phone cozie smelled like smoke after last night, so I washed it and it shrunk. Merh. Now I have to make another one. Or, I should probably do the smart thing and get a case for it.

It's Christmas day, there is food and booze everywhere, and everybody is randomly crashed in random places.

This Christmas has been very stress-free. I didn't buy a single gift.
One, because I don't have any extra money.
Two, because instead of buying siblings gifts, this year we decided to just pool whatever money we would have spent and give it to my parents for their trip to Kiev. Made mom cry. That's a win.

I also didn't get a ton of stuff.

So what did I open this morning? A Bissell shampooer thing. Completely frivolous and I love it. EVERYTHING WILL BE CLEAN. Also got some socks.

And that's about it. It's refreshing not to have a mountain of gifts, especially because I've been all about removing the clutter lately. Just a few small tokens here and there. This year it was more about hanging out with family & friends instead of focusing on the gifts. I rather enjoyed it.

Not to say that I didn't miss the rush of picking out something nice for everyone, and getting excited to see people open things. Next year will probably be back to normal, but with everything else going on lately, it was really nice to have a break from the stress and Christmas Greed.

Keeping with that theme, Suzy and I are going to see Les Miserables today. Ashley, too, if we can convince her to go.

P.S. I can't wait for that cold front to come through tonight.

eve

I'm hiding in my room because my mom is in a cleaning frenzy and I don't want to be put to work.

It's too damn hot here. I hate Houston's weather, especially in the wintertime. It's just a yo yo effect of temperatures and humidity and it SUCKS.

It's Christmas day in Japan. Chris says they're not doing anything special for Christmas, but I think they at least get a special meal.

Frank and I were sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee, when my mom hugged my dad and he goes, "Wait, let's move to the kitchen so we can make out." Ah, parentals. Leave some of the mystery for the rest of us.

Mom's making a batch of nut cups, so that will be my diet for the next few days.

It's going to be a long day. Let's get this show on the road.

241...

So many things I'd like to get out of my head.

To start, if you happened to catch any crazy posting, disregard. Nothing ever happened.

I just discovered that if you google 241543903 and hit images, it's kinda neat.

(Go do it. I'll wait.)

People are random and awesome, huh?

I wish we had made Christmas cookies because I could really go for one right now. 

I would also like to say that I love my husband. He takes so much of my random crap in stride.

I'm pretty tired. The rest can wait.

the style nowadays

My little sister is going out in a see-through skull-patterned top and she looks great.
Even my dad dug it --- my dad dug a see-through shirt on my sister. You know it's gotta be cool.
I feel cool just being associated with her, haha. Such is the usual.

back from the dead

with a shaved head.

After a short hiatus, zits are slowly coming back, in what seems to be full force. The current regime did its job- they were subdued enough that makeup covered them when I got hitched, but it's not a long-term solution. It may be because I haven't been taking the zinc. It was just too hard to keep track of on vacation. I've started taking it again, but I'm also glad my super awesome health insurance is effective in January. I am covered up the wazoo by two really kickass health insurance plans- both free. One's included with my benefits package at work, and one because of the whole military spouse thing. Read: I can finally see the dermatologist! Butttt not till next month.

I hate getting out of the shower and seeing 5 missed calls, 3 facebook messages, two text messages, and a voicemail. Once again, I missed the sporadic narrow period of time that Chris has found to communicate. Hmph.

I just found out my seeester is coming home tomorrow! Yay!!

glitters is gold

Today. I put whipped cream on my waffle. And in my coffee. A LOT in my coffee.

Woke up and it's raining outside. Checked the forecast on my phone, then checked the forecast for Japan. He's blissfully sleeping under a clear sky at 70 degrees, and I'm waking up to dim light and humid rain. A world apart.

I had dreams last night about our wedding. Not the way our actual wedding went. This one was on Jupiter. There were pretty lights and my dress was sequined and intricately embroidered and was gorgeous. One of his friends was a dj and everybody was dancing and I had to pee a lot, which required a very creative dismantling of the dress every time. We drank a lot and I eventually wandered off and he had to come find me. He scolded me, then said it was time to go, but I thought it was too early and we should keep partying. Then he made the good point that the bride and groom aren't supposed to be the last to leave. So he grabbed my hand and we left. It had a floaty, dream-like quality to it, not like those dreams which are very clear.

Still haven't figured out what to do about Christmas gifts. I don't get money until the end of the week, and it's all going to be funneled straight into bills. Hrm.

I painted my nails red with green glitter to help induce the Christmas spirit. Like the trendy ring finger that's different but still cohesive?

While I'm at it, I would like to talk about the Nikon Cool Pix S1100. I've had this camera for about a year, and I hate it. I absolutely hate the touch screen navigation. It's annoying, there's a delay, and it's not very easy to use. More importantly, I hate the quality of the pictures it takes, especially snapshots. Half of them come out blurry on the auto setting. Who has time to adjust settings when you're out and about? A snapshot should just be quick, and the auto setting should produce decent pictures, not unusable crappy pictures. Overall, it's just not a very trusty camera. I miss my clunky old Canon that took great pictures-- even after being dropped and enduring abuse that would destroy any other camera.

(P.S. Glitter reminded me of this song-- take a moment to jam like it's the late 90's.)

about it.

Laundry. Cat loves puking on my bed. Merh.

Started developing my financial goals + budget for the new year. Things are going to change with moving out and paying actual rent. It's a little scary because I'm not going to be able to say, "Hey mom I don't have any money to pay rent this month." That won't be ok.

Chris called from Japan early this morning, but I missed it. He's trying to stay motivated, and I'm trying to stay positive. Truth is, I think we're both pretty much over it. Come home and let me squeeze you.

Headache looming. Fridge is empty. Groceries need to happen soon. Feeling kind of mopey. Got the A/C running on December 15th. Sauce-age.

Hm. That's about it.

fire & phone

Wealp. Chris has started his next (and last!) deployment. Time to adjust again.

Work is good. This week has gone by super fast. We had fire safety training yesterday and I got to put out a "simulated" fire. They used to put out real fires in the parking lot, but they have a building in that spot now. Bummer. That would have been cool. I've never used a real fire extinguisher. There was a fire on my stove once, but it was small and I just put a lid on it. It's just as well because those kitchen ABC extinguishers make a huge mess.

I feel like I spend more time being frustrated with my new phone than I do talking on it. If I have time to fiddle with it, I can usually do things correctly. When I'm in a hurry, it's a different story. I haven't developed the new habits associated with this phone. Just this morning, my alarm went off and I pushed the snooze-- or so I thought. I'm glad I woke up in time to see that it wasn't going to go off again. Even answering a phone call is more difficult than it should be. On the plus side, I downloaded a Tetris app. So that's fun.

Time to go to work. I hope today goes by fast.

name.

My friends keep mentioning how my new name keeps throwing them off. I agree- It's so weird and cool seeing my new name. I mean, the name itself is familiar, but I'm just not used to it being mine.

I get a piece of mail and it looks weird. I see it out of the corner of my eye on a screen at work and I double-take. I have to think before signing something or putting my initials on a document.

Hearing people say it (or attempt to say it) is also so strange. It's weird telling people how to pronounce it. The whole situation is just new. I mean, I've had the same name for 28 years. It's a hard habit to break.

There's one new habit that I wonder how long it will last... With every new piece of mail or email change or credit card, I have to double-check, and sometimes triple-check, to see if it's spelled correctly. It's 11 letters of mis-spelling waiting to happen. So far, so good. But I'm going to catch it if does happen.

Also worth nothing: If I get a piece of mail or something with my old name, it's suddenly a little foreign. It's like I'm stuck in limbo between being disconnected from my old name, and adapting to this new one.

I think that's pretty normal.

good life

Random risotto craving at 7pm.

You know what? IT'S OKAY! I have time to make it! Because I don't have to wake up at 4am!
*happy dance*

Also, a serious cold front is supposed to come through tonight. DIGGING IT.

Risotto, wine, cold front, not witnessing 4am? 

Life is good.

catnip, candy, technology

Pumpkin is totally digging this catnip mouse and it's hilarious. She never plays with toys unless they're interactive- like you've got to be dangling something in front of her before she pays attention. But she likes this one! It must be the catnip, which she has also never paid attention to before. I always thought she was one of those cats who didn't react to it, but maybe she does just like it just a little.

Found out last night that Chris leaves the country much sooner than I expected. Not looking forward to being out of regular contact for 7 or 8 months. But, the sooner they deploy, the sooner they can come back. I hope he gets to experience some cool stuff this deployment. Actually, let me clarify: I hope he gets to experience some non-life-threatening cool stuff this deployment.

Helped Ashley and Collin paint the baby's room yesterday. A very nice light blue. It looks like a little boy's room. Next up is the jungle decals and a little more paint, then I make the curtains and one of those triangle banners. My heart goes, "Squee!" every time I think about it.

Regarding the pawn shop idea, I took a couple pieces of old jewelry to this place. It wasn't creepy or seedy or weird, as I feared, and the guy gave me twice as much as I expected. It wasn't a huge amount, but it was overall a very nice experience!

Akhtar's first annual gingerbread house party was fun. I was running late and didn't have time to make gluten free gingerbread, so instead I made some rice krispie treats. Worked like a charm. I took this picture on my phone, then had to figure out how to set up gmail on my phone. THEN I was able to email it to myself so I could put it in this post.

Between fiddling with my phone and calling Chris about 5 times, I figured out how to use some apps & the internet, and also learned about using wifi vs using wireless. Gettin' a little more savvy each day!

gogogo

What an interesting week. I'm tired. I feel like Monday was a month ago. Lots of changes in my personal life lately, and changes with work, too. The whirling dervish just might be winding down now. I'm ready for routine.

Work is delightful. Today my boss asked me if I missed my old job. I looked at her, smiled and said, "Not one single tiny bit." I feel very comfortable and motivated there. I've been coming in at 6am all week to train, and Monday I go in at my normal schedule. I'm curious how I'll adjust, but I have a feeling I'll be just fine. I can't wait to get started on some of the projects they're planning. Enough training- let me at it!

I have adjusted remarkably well to the lack of Chris. I don't know if I'm just getting used to this situation, or if I've been so busy and that's helped. I still get twinges, but the "mourning period" is not as intense as it usually is. That in itself makes me a little sad. I want to be used to him, not the lack of him.

I spent a few hours last night on my new space phone, and somehow managed to delete all of the features on my home page. It took a while to figure out how to individually put some of them back. I think as far as texting and phone calls go, I've figured it out. I haven't even touched the "smart" stuff. At the very least, I can talk on my phone for longer than 3 minutes now and it doesn't die. 

And that, folks, is a successful week.

clothing & money

Dear girl who works at the bank,

What made you think it's professional to wear a mini skirt and thigh high lace-up boots to work today? You look super trashy. I'm surprised they didn't send you home to change.

Enough about inappropriate work attire.

On the other hand, I've been looking super cute lately. No more frump girl in stained scrubs and tied-up hair. I may have done a little clothes shopping, but my wardrobe still needs updating. I have no clean pants to wear tomorrow. I didn't realize I only have 3 pairs of work pants. So tomorrow it's either a skirt or I'm doing laundry tonight. I haven't decided what's best.

What I do know is that things will have to make do until I get paid. Already pretty broke since it's been two weeks since my last payday, and will be 2 more until the next one.
Seriously considering declaring this year "No-gift Christmas." I simply can't afford it.

I actually have some old jewelry that I've been meaning to get rid of. It will certainly help pay a few bills, even if it's not a lot. Has anyone ever sold something to a pawn shop before?

easy cheese and rain boots

After-dinner snack of (apparently expired) Easy Cheese and Fritos, washed down with wine. What? There is literally no food in the fridge and I'm hungry. And thirsty.

On a possibly related note, one morning during his visit Chris rolled over, put his arm around me, grabbed up a handful of belly fat, and started squeezing. Oy, man. Not cool. I vow to have that taken care of pretty quickly. Just not tonight.

When I get back into my normal eating schedule of making dinner/ taking leftovers for lunch, I think it will be easier to regulate. Also I really need to get to the grocery store. There's nothing but junk food around here.

Today was good. And, I got pinkish purple rain boots.

come back...

So it's just me and the kitten again. Well, actually, kitten is running around outside at the moment. So it's just me. and wine.

Chris couldn't sleep last night, which means I couldn't sleep last night. We woke up early this morning, and Akhtar drove Chris to the airport while I headed to the Medical Center to start my new job.

What followed was a good, but exhausting day. Lots of new employee forms to fill out, lots of meeting people, lots of standing around while people explain stuff. I love the people and the work, and overall I'm excited and think this will be a great thing for me.

I came home weary, and dug into the pile of mail sitting on my desk.

First thing I opened was a new social security card. Would have come in handy today when I tried to change my name at work and they wouldn't let me because they needed it. So my boss just set me up with all this stuff, only to have to change it all tomorrow when I go to HR and change my name. Awesomeee.

Also received a new debit card, and some forms needed to change my name on the car note. For the record, my new name is too long to fit on the card. I kinda love that.

It still amazes me that all it takes to change my name at one company is making a phone call and spelling it out, yet at another they need a form filled out, a certified copy of the marriage license, a copy of my social security card & birth certificate, fingerprints, and dna sequencing from a piece of both mine and Chris' hair-- in a triple-thick padded envelope, delivered by a leprechaun.

Even within the same company- my checking and savings accounts were taken care of by one visit, but the credit card linked to those same accounts requires a completely different process-- and nobody thought to mention that to me, even after I asked the lady if the credit card was taken care of and she assured me it was. It's enough to drive me INSANE. (got no brain)

To add to the crazy of today, I ordered a new space phone, or a space phone~ lite. It's not exactly bells & whistles galore, but in a couple of days a bonafide smart phone will be delivered to my door. I'm kinda excited. And have no idea how to use it. I figure it will keep me distracted from the fact that there's suddenly no more husband hanging around. And I'll be able to receive picture messages again.

Today was a stressful day, as days with lots of big life changes are bound to be, and I miss Chris so much I don't even know how to handle it, but it's also a day of new beginning, and it's something that I've needed for a long time.

Even with the stress, I have something to look forward to. I have a purpose. Because at the end of the day, today and every day, all I have to do is walk through a patient waiting area to give myself a really big fat reality check. I think that daily perspective will go a long way.

greased

Finally! My name is officially changed on the first of many accounts. The squeaky wheel gets the grease!

Also, I think it's strange and a little uncohesive how one organization will accept a scan of a copy of the marriage license, while others require you to mail in a certified copy (they're not free, mind you), while others require you to bring in the original in person.

For instance, the social security office was fine with a certified copy, but the dmv required the original, even in the presence of a changed social security card, the certified copy, and the certificate of marriage from the JP. The ASCP was happy with a copy that I resized from the original legal size to standard size, then scanned and emailed.

I mean, clearly it's legitimate. It's not like I'm trying to go through the hassle of changing my name to trick people. It's ridiculous!

part 3.

Where was I in my epic story? Oh, yes. San Antonio. We got there, checked into our hotel, and drank more champagne on the balcony overlooking the riverwalk. His sister called the hotel and upgraded our room to one with a private balcony. That was pretty cool.

I honestly don't remember what we did or when we did it. We mostly hung out at the riverwalk, drank champagne, and got a few things that Chris needs for this deployment at various manly stores around town. There was plenty of gluten free food to eat, including Little Aussie.

We also got a couples massage at the spa. We always stay at hotels with spas, but have never actually used them. I figured a honeymoon was a pretty good time to start. It was my first massage. At times it was a little uncomfortable. Overall it was nice, but I don't think I will go out of my way to get another one.

We came home on Thanksgiving day, and headed straight to Ashley's for dinner. Got to see my siblings before they all scattered again.

Since we've been home, we've pretty much stayed up late, slept late, ran errands, hung out, and caught up on Breaking Bad. It's glorious, but bittersweet because I know it will end soon.

I'm also in the process of changing my name, which is infuriating at times. The DMV can go suck a dick. I waited in line an hour and a half for them to tell me they could not use a certified copy of the marriage license that I specifically purchased from the County Clerk's office for this type of thing. It's worked everywhere else, including the social security office. Even the County Clerk's office thought that was ridiculous and sympathized with me when I called asking how to get the original back. I kinda have a short window when it comes to being able to waste two hours at the DMV, since I start my new job next week. I'll do the best I can...

That, and I have a list a mile long of crap that needs to be taken care of. But at least for now I have a hubby hanging around that makes things a little better.

Shopping buzz

Today I went shopping for work clothes, since the majority of my wardrobe consists of scrubs and t-shirts. I literally have no more business casual clothing, except for a few pairs of pants & skirts. I literally have no winter clothes, either.

I ended up with 2 sweaters, 4 long-sleeved shirts, 1 sequined tank top, 2 cardigans, 1 sweater dress, 1 pair of shoes, and 1 coffee cup for $120. I saved $95. Where? Old Navy. I love that place.

Mr. and Mrs.

This is the story of the day I became a wife.

We woke up a little hazy from the booze the night before. Ate breakfast, started getting ready. Well, I mostly hung out in my robe and drank coffee.

When Ashley got here, she did my makeup while Suzy did my hair and Chris slightly stressed that we were running out of time. I assured him that it was okay- I'm the bride; I'm not late. Everyone else is just early. He was not amused.

I popped a few pepto and squeezed into my "body condom," as Chris so creatively dubbed my Spanx slip. Completed the look with an actual dress, some pearl jewelry, and my shimmery heels.

We hopped into the cars, looking really nice. My family knows how to clean up. After a short drive to the Justice of the Peace, Chris's mom handed me a gorgeous bouquet, and it was the first moment I felt like a bride.

We headed into the courtroom and waited for everyone to get there. We took a bazillion pictures, in every combination possible. Then, right on time, things got started.

We all got situated, and Chris's dad, stepdad, and grandpa stood up there with him. Dad gave me away, kissed me on the cheek, and the ceremony started.

Chris looked so handsome in his blues, but it was the expression on his face that made me tear up. He looked so comfortable, so happy, and so ready. He said his vows while holding my hands and looking at me like he truly meant what he was saying. I was overwhelmed by his sincerity and all of the happiness in the room. You could really feel it from our friends and family surrounding us, aiming their little care bear beams of happiness right at us. So, naturally, I said my vows while trying not to cry, and of course a few people videotaped it.

There was a funny part where Chris repeated something that the judge said, but he wasn't supposed to. I thought I had zoned out and was supposed to repeat it and was thinking, "Oh crap I messed up!" But it was ok. He's the one that messed up. ;o)

Shortly after the laughter, the judge officially pronounced us husband and wife. My mom cried. There were large group hugs. It was a room full of joy and I was in the middle of it with my brand spankin' new, handsome as all hell husband. Rawr.

After the ceremony was complete, we went outside where many more pictures were taken, and we headed to lunch. Lunch was meh. There was an issue with the food, but overall it was a lovely time. Toasts were made. Some were more touching and some were more funny, but they were all great. I can't believe the overwhelming generosity and well wishes of his family, my family, and our dearest friends. I have never felt more loved.

When lunch was over, we went home, packed our bags again, and headed to San Antonio for our honeymoon.

Something old: My pearls.
Something new: Dress and shoes.
Something borrowed: Mom's earrings.
Something blue: My Marine (and a blue ribbon on my bouquet)

Toot's home

Whew. I have some catching up to do. Not really feeling the "one epic post." So, I'll start at the beginning.

I met Chris at the baggage claim on Friday. There's nothing better than his smile after 7 months. There might have been some public making-out-age.

Off to Galveston! Chris reserved a fancy shmancy room at our favorite hotel, the San Luis. We were given glasses of champagne at check-in, the first of many over the course of the last week and a half.

The hotel room had a great view, nightly turndown service with pillow chocolate, room service breakfast, champagne, and a freaking tv in the bathroom mirror. I said IN the bathroom mirror. I took a picture, but Chris is standing there in a towel and I doubt he wants that on the internet. At one point during our stay, I was taking a shower and Chris barges in saying, "WHY are you not watching TV???" Of course, how silly of me. When there's a tv embedded in your bathroom mirror, you pretty much HAVE to watch it. While showering.  So, I did- for the rest of the stay. It was ridiculous and awesome.

Badass hotel rooms aside, we had a fantastic weekend.

We visited the Pleasure Pier one night. It was tons of fun, and Chris even convinced me to ride the crazy-intense-for-a-boardwalk roller coaster. I think I lost years of my life on that thing. He won me a stuffed giraffe playing Whack-a-Mole, and I stuffed it into one of the cannons outside of the pirate's plunge ride. I figured if it was still there later, I'd take it home. When we went back after several hilarious rounds of bumper cars, it was gone.

We also spent an afternoon at Moody Gardens, checking out both the aquarium and the rainforest. The penguins were a hit.

One night we headed down to the pool, and discovered that the USMC in Galveston was having their birthday ball at the hotel. If we would have known, I would have brought a gown and we could have crashed it since Chris had his blues with him.

Instead, we grabbed some drinks and beelined towards the hot tub, since it was cold that night. It turned out there were several really nice, really cool people soaking up the heat. We recognized one couple because we shared a row of seats with them on the boardwalk roller coaster of doom. The other couple was there for their daughter's dance competition, and were actually from Sugar Land. Small world, huh? So we chatted for a while. I love meeting cool people on vacation, especially in the hot tub. Nothing more awkward than just sitting there not talking.

At one point Chris and I braved the cold night air to try out the water slide, which is NOT heated like the main pool. After an exhilarating, freezing ride down the slide and the shocking dunk into the unheated pool, we ran back to the hot tub and stayed there for the rest of the night.

Sunday we checked out the flight museum, headed back home, discovered that Chris ordered his ring WAY too big, and hung out with some of the family members that had traveled here for the wedding. Oh, and ordered another ring for Chris.

After an evening full of champagne and good times, it was time for bed.

Because the next day would change my life forever.

cilantro

It might not be my fault that I can't stand it!
For the record, I don't think it's soapy or buggy, though.

hey guys

My stomach kinda hurts, but damn this wine is so good. I'm going to keep drinking it.

Tomorrow is my last day at work. Today they got me a cake and a gift certificate for my manicure, so I can use it before my wedding. It was one of those, "Awww" moments. I have some really sweet coworkers, and I'm really going to miss some of them.

Moving right along. I have a list of shit a mile long that I need to do tomorrow afternoon, and I hope I can get it all done-- and still make the book signing I've been wanting to go to.

Maybe I'll just stay up late and get everything done here tonight, that way tomorrow afternoon is free to run errands. But then I'll be tired tomorrow. Merh. Ooh, I almost forgot to refill my prescription before my insurance runs out.

Ok, I'm going to figure out what I'm going to do... and do it.

Calvin

By the way, this is my nephew, just chillen out in my sister's belly. Gah, the widdwe feets!
I can't wait to hold them for real.

encounters

Today I was pulling up to the gas pump at a crowded station when someone swooped in and stole my spot. I gave him a "COME ON!" gesture and he just shrugged. That's when I realized that he was Santa Claus. Or, he looked just like him.

Needless to say, I went to another pump and let Santa have it.

making merry

My mom keeps drunkenly inviting people to our tiny little courthouse wedding.

Then, she doesn't even remember doing it. And it's random people, like my brother in law's parents, who don't even like us! And we purposely didn't invite aunts and uncles, because they're loud and obnoxious as a group, and if we invite one we have to invite them all, which is like 50 people. But my dad keeps telling them when & where everything is and I just know they're going to crash it.

So after Ashley brought this most recent addition to my attention, I asked mom about it. She laughed and said she'd forgotten she invited them, and said that she'd call and tell them she was mistaken; we really don't have any room to add people. Wow, how offensive are we to have to un-invite someone!

I wonder who she's invited that she doesn't remember-- and what random-ass people are going to show up-- to our tiny little intimate courthouse wedding. If we were having a big wedding, I wouldn't mind so much. That's what big weddings are for, so everyone and their mom, (and my mom's friends) can come. The more the merrier!

I really don't want to be that tacky group making a scene in the quiet little courthouse. I know we'll do that anyway, because my family is loud on a normal day, but I'm slightly dreading it because I just know it's going to get out of hand. Everyone's on their best behavior until there's something to celebrate, then all hell breaks loose. We're not known for knowing how to throw a great party for nothing!

lucky party girl

It looks like a lingerie store exploded in here. Once again I'm bowled over by the generosity of these amazing people that I call my friends.

Seriously, I've wondered it before, and I'm wondering it again. How do I deserve to be surrounded by these wonderful people? I can't wait until my work schedule changes and I have time to be a better friend again. That's one of the things I'm looking forward to the most.

Although I feel like further elaboration is not necessary, last night was so much fun. Dinner & lingerie shower was a blast. The food was great, the company was better, and damn it my friends looked so cute. We were a good-looking bunch. I loved my light-up "bachelorette" sash and my penis headband, haha.

The strip club was quite the new experience. I just... wow, haha. A whole other culture inside that little building. The men were, of course, muscley and in little underwear. It was pretty much what you'd expect until the point when one of the guys stripped off his suit to reveal a sparkly white speedo with a ginormous bedazzled codpiece. It was at that point when we decided the night was turning weird and it was probably time to leave. I will say this. The men at La Bare know what they're doing. They have complete confidence, which is always hot. Also some of those chicks have NO SHAME. And both Vicky and Akhtar were great sports about it all. I owe them big time. If they ever need help hiding a body, I'm there- no questions asked. That is all I have to say about all of that, haha.

Overall, I had a blast and I got to try something new. I think that was a new experience for us all. And I'm going to sit here and drink my coffee amidst my teddies and bras and tissue paper and think about how lucky I am.

Today.

Make sure you do, too. I don't care who you vote for; just do it.

Got a little more stuff squared away for the new job this afternoon. When I was leaving, the guy who took the picture for my badge said, "Welcome back." I guess my info is still in the system from when I went to school there. (A little hint to where I'll be working, without publicly announcing it on here. You know I try to keep certain details about work confidential.) Oh, that made me smile. It's just... amazing.

I've got a fun weekend planned- bachelorette party and Les Miserables. Then, just another short week until my honey is back home.

Oh, I can't wait to feel like the world is right again. There's this huge chunk of my life missing, and it's the part where he belongs. I think I notice it more now that I'm fixing other things in my life that I'm unhappy with. Missing him doesn't blend in with the funk anymore. It's standing out now. Of course, that probably also has to do with the fact that he's coming home so very soon.

So many good things are happening in such a short amount of time, in rapid succession. I just don't know how to handle the excitement!

So long, farewell

auf Wiedersehen*, goodBYE.

Speaking of two weeks and no regrets, I have officially submitted my two weeks notice and resignation. Why? To make a long, complicated story short, I received an amazing offer from a world-famous hospital. I have Andrea to thank for it-- and I couldn't be more thankful or lucky. Or excited!

This decision has been a large source of stress in the last few weeks. Sometimes solutions just fall into your lap out of nowhere, and the rest of your life follows- but not without bumps in the road and tons of anxiety.
Things are at a point where they're calming down and I feel like it's safe to mention it because it's really going to happen. (Although at times I feel like it's too good to be true and get paranoid that something will happen to ruin it. Maybe because it was on the downlow for so long, now I feel strange talking about it.)

It has made me feel good when I tell my coworkers and people at the hospital that I'm leaving, and they are all surprised and sorry to hear it.
Quite a few people have told me that they're sorry I'm leaving, because I'm really good at my job and they've enjoyed working with me.
It's good to hear that people noticed-- including my boss. She made a ridiculously generous counter-offer, but at this point it's not worth it. I've been taken advantage of for too long.

Honestly, I don't feel any animosity towards anyone in particular. I'm ready to leave for a variety of reasons. Although this cracked me up:

So, on to bigger and better things. It's been a long time coming. I'm ready to be happier.
  
Here's to my new life!



*I just love this movie

free-flowing

I noticed last night that the sink in my bathroom was draining a bit slow. With no drano in the house, I figured I'd try something else. If it didn't work, I'd still have to go to the store to buy drano anyway, so it couldn't hurt.

I dumped some baking soda in the sink, followed by enough vinegar to wash it all down into the drain. Then, I let it sit for as long as it took to boil a pot of water. When it was boiling, I poured it down the drain. It didn't seem to fix the problem, so I squirted some dish soap down there and went to bed.

This morning I repeated the baking soda/ vinegar/ boiling water process, and voila! No more clog. I can now brush my teeth and wash my face without having to look at the scum floating in the sink.

Speaking of scum, now begins the steady two-week process of cleaning this dump before Chris comes home. When I started yesterday, I was disgusted by how much dust is in here. Also, I already have a box full of stuff to donate. Yay de-clutter!

P.S. Did you catch that? Two weeks!

slumber "party"

Shit has been CRAZY around here. Almost ready to talk about it.

On to last night. I had a sore throat, a fever, and hadn't slept well lately. Sleep-deprivation combined with massive amounts of stress probably contributed to sickness. So I took a leftover tylenol with codeine from the wisdom teeth and went to bed. I slept very soundly.

At about 1am, I felt something touch my hand and immediately shot up. I knew what it was. I turned on the light and sure enough, a huge cockroach on my pillow.

Ohhhh I can't even stand it. I was so horrified. I can't smash roaches, or even get close to them. I usually attack with spray products from a safe distance while squealing and jumping around. Or, even better, yell for my brother or dad. But, at 1 am, I was on my own with my spray bottle of bleach.

So I was forced to watch while it ran around on my pillows. Oh, my GOD, disgusting. Then it went on to my nightstand, walking over my cell phone, glasses, and kindle. When it got to the tissue box, I sprayed it with bleach. Eventually it fell to the floor, where I worked up enough courage to put a cup over it.

I changed my sheets and disinfected the other stuff it touched, trying not to think about how long it had crawled all over me before I woke up out of my drug-induced slumber. Then I called Chris. He asked, "Are you okay? You sound like you're about to cry." And I said, "NO!" I wasn't okay. How could I be okay after something like that???

I talked to him for a minute, then tried to go back to sleep. I kept the light on. Every time I started to doze, I'd feel my hair touch my cheek or something, and start awake. I just couldn't relax wondering where this huge roach had come from, and if it had any friends lurking in the shadows that wanted to join the slumber party.

I'm also wondering why the roach would ignore the disgusting sink full of yummy roach-friendly dishes in the kitchen, and come hang out with poor, sleeping sick me.

But, I texted my dad when I left for work and he came in and treated again. He did not, however, remove the roach from under its cup prison. I called my mom while I was still at work, and she lifted the cup a tiny bit and didn't see it on the floor. We figured it had crawled up in the cup. So she sprayed some poison up in it and set it back down. I made my brother go lift it up when I got home, and there it was, all dead with its nasty legs all sticking up. Both the roach and the cup were disposed of.

One of my worst nightmares, a roach crawling into bed with me, came true. I came out alive, but not unscathed. I don't know how long it will be until I won't be skitzy and paranoid about roaches in my bed now.

Tues-MF-day

Today I dragged myself out of bed, told myself, "It's going to be a good day!"

... and was dropping F-bombs and getting pissy by 6am.

And then, and THENNN, the ICU had the NERVE to accuse me of not doing my job right, and not getting their results on time. Too bad I've had results out on time every single day for as long as I've been working there. In fact, I get results finished wayyy before the deadline. I have proof because every verified result is timestamped, and that can't be changed. So they can go suck on a dick for all I care.

When the guy in charge at the hospital came up to me and voiced those concerns, I just looked him dead in the eye and said, "No." Then politely informed him that the issue is NOT with me. Instead of taking a look at their own people, they run right to the lab and blame us. I take offense to shit like that because I work really hard and I'm really good at my job, and getting results out on time is my first priority in the mornings.

So now I have to call the nursing supervisor every morning when I'm finished running the morning's labs. Checking in like I'm a fucking 5-year old. Like I need one more thing to worry about.

Heh, no regrets here.

:o)

fooooooooods

My belly is not happy with me.

I think a large part of it has to do with the antibiotics. I always get tummy mehs from those. Plus, I'm out of yogurt.

It could be due to the fact that I ate my weight in fritos and cheese dip yesterday. It could have been the cake pops, deviled eggs, or candied bacon. It could have been all of that, in combination with the several cups of hot cocoa + marshmallows that went down the hatch. It was all soooooo good.

Needless to say, today I'm craving clean, whole, simple foods that are also filling. I'm also craving meat. Not chicken. I'm soooo sick of chicken. I want fish and beef.

It's too late to go shopping today. Fighting Sunday shoppers is not on the list today. So, working with what I've got for now.

On the menu this week:

Cheesy Zucchini rice- on the stove right now. Adding beans and making wraps for lunch leftovers
Pumpkin pie (sans crust- baked in ramekins, half the sugar) for second breakfasts- in the oven right now.
Egg & potato breakfast burritos
Chili- for chili frito pie. No sense in letting those leftover fritos go to waste. Great crock pot meal.
Also craving Pei Wei's spicy chicken. Might have to make that happen this week.

outdoors

What a fun afternoon.

progress, pumpkins

I woke up this morning, looked in the mirror, and went, "Wow."

But for the first time in a while, it wasn't out of horror. 

My face has really cleared up in the past week. Last night I... how did my sister put it? Went at my face like a meth-head? Some really nasty stuff came out of my pores, but I just couldn't stand it anymore. So, naturally, I was afraid I would wake up and it would be all red and infected. But it really isn't bad.
Now, instead of active angry zits, it looks like my main concern will be healing the scars and lightening the spots that the zits have left behind. Anyone recommend a product for that??

Acne progress aside, today is a gloriously cool, sunny day. Perfect for pumpkin carving. I think that this year, instead of carving the pumpkins and dealing with guts, I'll try to paint mine. But then, I don't get as many roasted pumpkin seeds. Decisions...

I've also heard that if you set a whole pumpkin out in the corner of the yard and just let it rot, you'll end up with a pumpkin patch in the spring. How neat would that be?

Read: The Time Keeper

I've read a few of Mitch Albom's books. Always thought-provoking, entertaining, and easy reads. The Time Keeper was no different. I actually read it in about an hour, all in one sitting. A little chewing gum for the mind.

Pssst

Hey, self.
This is a reminder that everything will work out the way it should.

If things don't go the way you want, it's okay.
In the past, it's always been okay even if things go the wrong way.
Because eventually, the wrong way turned out to be the right way.

This is a rough spot, but you have the strength and resources to change things. Things will change, no matter what, because you are prepared.

So calm down, let go a little, have a little faith, and see where the universe falls into place for you.

feeling real

It wasn't until today that things started to feel real.

Everyone else has seemed more excited than me. For me it's been surreal. And stressful. And something that might fall through at the last second. Or, you know, he might change his mind.

But today, I took some forms to the county clerk's office. Forms that he willingly filled out, and had signed and notarized and mailed to me. Then, in a short amount of time, a very nice lady hooked me up with a marriage license. With my name on it and his name on it. Our names together on a marriage license. Whoa.

I didn't even get a chance to really look at it or take a picture of it. I had it in my possession for about 20 minutes. Because immediately afterwards I went over to the Justice of the Peace and made the appointment, handing over the marriage license. Easy peasy. I left practically jumping with joy. That was the hard part. This is really scheduled to happen. If nothing else happens that day, we will be getting married.

That is CRAZY dude!
In three and a half weeks I'm going to be a wife!

It's Monday Y'all

Almond Joy... pre-workout food? I think so.

P.S. Ashley how many did you eat without me noticing? Because I KNOW I didn't eat them all.

Currently at 4:30 run... 5 days ago. At the pace of This song. Ahh, memories.
Eesh. Can I do 5:00?

ah,

sigh.

notice

It's funny how the cat ignores me until I make tuna mac & cheese. (with peas!)

bunco & skin

It turns out, bunco is quite fun.

My mom threw a party for her bunco group at our house last night, and my sister and I were subs because a few people couldn't make it. It was a halloween themed party, and most of the ladies had on costumes. My favorite was an Amy Winehouse. Even though neither of us knew anyone, they were all very friendly. It's a nice bunch. (You never know how catty it's going to be when you get 13 women together in the same room, ya know?) But there didn't seem to be any of that. Both Ashley and I got "bunco" at some point, which was exciting, if short-lived. Anyway, it was fun.

Yesterday I went to the doctor. I figured I'd see my primary care physician before the dermatologist because the copay is 20 bucks less. I couldn't wait anymore. My face is horrible and painful.

He gave me some antibiotics to take twice a day for 3 weeks (3 weeks with no wine! Ahh!) to clear up this particular breakout. He also gave me some antibiotic gel to apply to my face every day and kinda keep things regulated. I remembered this too late to mention to the doctor, but I called the pharmacist and asked if the zinc I've been taking would interact with the antibiotics. Turns out, it will.

She told me not to suddenly stop taking it because my energy levels would drop. That's good, because I like the way it makes my skin behave and I don't want to stop taking it. After 3 weeks of taking it daily, my skin is less oily and breakouts heal faster. It doesn't seem to do much for preventing the breakouts, though. Further research (the insert that came with the prescription-- always read those!) indicates that I can take the antibiotics at breakfast and dinner daily, and the zinc with lunch every other day.

I also have been cleaning my makeup brushes and pillowcases weekly, and being careful not to contaminate any makeup.

So, for the next few weeks I'm going to be a pill-popping, cream-smearing, sober diva. And hopefully much less zitty.

Dear Face,

What. The fuck.
Seriously now.

I've never had acne; occasional zits in my T-zone. At this moment, there's acne all over my cheeks, chin, and forehead. Some of it is cystic and painful. Some popped up literally months ago and just won't freaking heal. Some are scars. Some are on my back and neck.

I'm off next Thursday, and one of the many appointments I'm making that day is going to be a dermatologist. Looked up the info at work today. Hopefully, zits will not be a part of my life anymore. This is ridiculous. I look like a rather unfortunate 15-year old boy.

saywhaaaat

Thoughts:

- Christopher did a very, very good job of picking out my engagement ring. I seriously could not have designed a better ring myself. Mostly because I had no idea what I wanted, but he got everything I wanted... if that makes sense. I don't even care about the band issue because I love it so much I'd be happy to wear just this forever. I frequently look at it and think, "Damn. That's a pretty ring." Kinda like I look at him (while skyping) and think, "Damn that's a handsome man."  I can't wait to do that more often.

-I had a dream about meal planning. It was so organized and glorious.

-Suddenly I just got very weary, tired, and headachey. Like I would love nothing more than to lie down. BUT. Ashley is coming over with sweets and SHOES.

-I'm SOOOO zittty! I got frustrated and picked at some bumps and now, of course, it's worse. Shame on me.

-Struggling to remain positive. I'm just so run-down and OVER IT.

-I want something fried. Like cheese sticks or egg rolls or chicken fried steak. Oh God, do you KNOW how long it's been since I've eaten a chicken fried steak? Way before this celiac thing started, that's for sure. (Sorry, preggers peoples reading this- I'm sure I just stimulated a craving). However, I have no such fried things.

-Something got all leaky and rotty inside my trash can. Yeeuck.

-I read an interesting article today about algea infections for my certification maintenance. It had never occurred to me that algea could be pathogenic. I figured it's just something you wash off your skin- not entirely true.

-Then I came across an article about celiac disease and I'm very interested to check that out. I've done surprisingly little research about it.

-You can microwave popcorn kernels in a plain paper bag. But it comes out pretty dry. You gotta season that shiz.

-Big Bang Theory kicks ass. Currently in my Netflix selections. I'm quite enjoying it.

-I want another tattoo.

not according to plan:

When you plan on being super awesome, and instead you end up being underwhelming. Then afterwards you're like, "How did that happen??"

I think I'm going to start using the word PLAN sarcastically, exclusively.

Hey, you know what else?? WINE!

pumpkin

doesn't want me to pay bills. Apparently it's petting time.

Best halloween movie ever

As if it needed confirmation, 23 reasons why.

stufffffs

Ok. So I've been told by Ashley that my "blog posts are unsatisfying." Such a shame since she even installed it as an app on her phone.

Here's the thing. I have some big shit to talk about. But I just can't talk about it yet. And some stuff I'm working on is a surprise. And some stuff is not exactly common knowledge so I can't talk about it. I have all this neat shit going on and I can't blog about any of it!

So in the meantime I just sit tight and keep my mouth shut and wait. Which, you know for me is damn near impossible.

So to update on the things I normally touch on:

Wedding: plans have kinda stalled. Waiting on the one-month mark to get the marriage license. Then, things can really go into motion. Plans can be made, reservations can be set, etc. His ring has been ordered. I haven't picked mine out yet. I settled on a plain silver or white gold band for now, so it can be worn under my gloves in the lab and is easily cleaned. A custom band will be designed later.

Work: same old stuff, different day. Go to work, get paid. Not overly excited about any of it.

Exercise: Motivated by two things: One- the sausage casing that I'll be wearing under my wedding dress so peeps don't see my undies. Unflattering and not exactly comfortable. Hoping if I'm more toned it will be a little less of both of those things. Two- someone will be seeing me naked again. I've gotten used to just letting it all hang out. While the cat doesn't mind, that will not be acceptable in 6 weeks. Today I ran for 4:30. Hollaaaa.

Other thoughts: I wish it would get cold again. Those few days of nice weather was really... well, nice.
 
I'd love to have Sofia Vergara's body. I just read an article about her in Allure and now she's my new girl crush. Also I'm bummed that Modern Family comes on after my bedtime so I haven't been able to watch it for the last few seasons.

I just got an email that my October Birchbox has been delayed due to some shipping issue.
About the Birchbox: I like it. It's like a little present inside the mailbox every month. Have I gotten hooked on anything that I've gotten? Not really. I usually give half of it away to my mom or sisters. But that's okay because it's like little presents for everybody.

There's usually a lip color, a perfume sample, a skincare product, a little nail polish, and other doodads. I've gotten false eyelashes twice. Those went to Suzy, who is far more likely to wear them. I don't wear perfume, so the samples kinda end up randomly around the house. I did get a pair of headphones once, which was awesome.

I do like these hair ties. I've gotten two so far, and Ashley stole one. Most of the skincare products I don't use, since I've been so breaky-outy lately. Several times I've received items that contain gluten, which I've chosen not to use since I just feel weird avoiding it all day, only to use it on my body. So I gave those away as well.

Overall, though, I enjoy it.

P.S. I really want a pair of colored pants. Maybe with polka dots. But I don't think I can pull them off.

yo.... cut it.

yet another

reason why my mom is awesome

Randoms for Sunday

If only Sundays weren't marred by the thought of having to wake up before dawn the next day. That's ok, there's a plan for that. And I feel like maybe it's time to leave things up to a higher power. See what the man upstairs has planned and remain content with my situation in the meantime. Things always work out.

I recently discovered that Chris looks hot with a beard. Especially with glasses.
Exhibit A:
This picture he posted on Facebook. Six weeks till squeezin' time.

It's a glorious 60 degrees today. Glorious! I have the door open and Pumpkin is coming and going as she pleases. I have a feeling we will have a lizard visitor at some point today.

Somehow all of my small storage containers have gone missing. I have no idea how I managed to lose, use, and/or throw away all of them. I can't be the only person who ever has that problem, because they keep selling them.

It was a very productive week as far as getting things done and having discussions that needed to be had. I feel much more peaceful inside.

calm

you know what honey?

everything is going to be allll right.

quick: exercise and relationships

Yesterday I decided to change up my walking exercise and inserted a run. I made it about 3 minutes.

Today I was sore, and I thought, "If I run again maybe it will work out the soreness." So I did the same thing, and made it another 3-ish minutes.

That idea was full of nothing but LIES. I'm still sore. Possibly more so.

My old lady hip that got messed up several months ago during a cartwheel [something I'm clearly too old for] is bothering me more, too.

However, in the midst of aches and pains, I feel like I'm doing something good for myself. I like to remind myself that I've never regretted a workout; I've only regretted skipping them. Lately I like to imagine my heart beating stronger, the blood cells speeding through vessels, and focus on how every breath literally brings life to all these cells that have been just kinda hanging out all day. It's like they're like, "Yay! Something to do!" Just like how Andrea likes to say that when we pull up to the McDonald's drive thru all our fat cells go, "Yay!!" But... opposite, haha.


Topic change:

Startling realization: Every time that I ask Chris to do something, the automatic response is "Yes" or "Ok" or something in the affirmative. Which always makes me think, "Hey that was easy!"

Then you know what? It doesn't get done until many more repeated questions and affirmative responses later. But I hardly even notice that because he always says ok and I always think about how easy that was! Sneaky psychological mind tricks!

Theatre tickets

Nothing like big ole whiff of sour milk first thing in the morning to wake you up. Uck. Good thing I went grocery shopping and got some new stuff yesterday.

Last night was the first show of our Broadway season tickets! We got all fancied up and saw Beauty and the Beast- one of my childhood favorites.

We had dinner at Benjy's, which I've never tried. Cool concept, nice atmosphere, awkward waiter, lovely conversation, and delicious entrees, though slightly overpriced with smallish portions.

The show was really good. It was funnier than I expected. Belle was my favorite. Her voice was amazing. She sounded just like the movie version.

We all agreed that the first act was great- I particularly enjoyed the bar scene during Gaston's song, and the visual effects during Be Our Guest. The second act left much to be desired- it's like they ran out of time while designing the set and just threw it together.

For that, we decided that it did not beat out The Lion King (which only Missy has seen and determined is the show to beat) but it was still a delightful night and entertaining show.

Requisite picture of Akhtar and his harem of lovely ladies. Seriously, we clean up pretty nice.

Thoughts of late

- Plan B (yet to be described here) is starting to get a move on. I'm scared. Plan A is safe! Plan B just kinda randomly inserted itself into my life and I'm nervous I'll get myself all excited over nothing. Enough of Plan B. It's not safe to talk about yet.

- I've had an unpleasant taste in my mouth lately. My oral hygiene routine hasn't changed, so I dunno what's the deal.

- Started wearing contacts again. We have to start wearing safety glasses in the lab, or else attach these little side-cover things to our prescription glasses. Well, the side-things don't do much but sit on your temples and be annoying and do absolutely nothing to protect your eyes. So, contacts + legitimate safety glasses is the new thing. Apparently I look a lot different in contacts, or so my coworkers say. I just think I look like me. SHRUG. Which means I should go to the eye doctor soon because I'm wearing an old prescription.

- Officially going to look for dermatologists next week. Zits are back by force. Enough is enough. I'm a grown-ass woman and I'm sick of it. Besides, I need this shiz cleared up by the time the nuptials roll around. Ain't nothing windex is going to clear up...

- In addition to the funky mouth, in general I just feel funky. Gross and sluggish. I feel like I need a good long sweaty run or something. Or a detox. < --- hahaha yeah, right. For real, though. Since I'm making the doctor rounds, I might as well make a trip to the GP. I've also been putting off a trip to the gyno. I wonder if I can get it all done in 1 week?

- Been completing a lot of my continuing education courses lately. I've got a lot of catching up to do. It feels so much like studying. It's kinda nice to exercise the brain a little, but also glad it's in small doses. STILL have an aversion to studying, 2 years out.

shoutouts

Mom really helped me out today. Friends are more awesome than I deserve. Sistahs there for me every second that I've ever needed them. Truly blessed.
Really tired, and I haven't showered, or eaten, or packed a lunch for tomorrow, and there's crap everywhere, but I'm feelin' good.

Shoes.

Let's take a break from how frustrating things are right now, and talk about... shoes!

I finally took a pair of shoes, slapped some glitter and mod podge on them, and gave them new life!

These are my shoes.

My beloved black pumps that are so comfortable that I can stand in them all day. They'd seen better days, for sure.

A coat of mod podge, a generous coat of glitter on top, let dry for a day or so, then repeated. After the second glitter coat had dried, I applied another coat of just mod podge, so it wouldn't shed glitter herpes everywhere. The effect:

Pretty new glittery shoes! The best part is, they were already broken in so they are comfortable as all get-out. Plus, the mod podge and glitter only cost me a few dollars.

Shoes!
...betch.

P.S. These are not the aforementioned glittery wedding shoes. Those are these, but in platinum gold, which I can't find online. Gorgeous! 

whelm.

Hoo.

Being pulled in 10 different directions right now. One thing after another. I feel like various parts of my life have been grabbed, tossed up in the air, and are being suspended above my head. Then, just to liven things up a bit, other stuff is being thrown in and juggled with the original stuff, and the original stuff is being switched out with new stuff. All at the same time.

I'm so scatterbrained. I need a big giant to-do list that I can carry around my neck like flavor flav's clock (or whatever that thing is). Or a personal assistant. I'll just pay her in gum.

Oh yeah, I'm broke again. My debit card was a slut this weekend. Something about the allure of sparkly wedding shoes that makes me whip out my debit card a little too fast. I am a woman, after all. Oh, those shoes are gorgeous.

But, all this tumult is for a reason. It's all eventually going to be good things. I just wish there was a switch I could flip to make it all turn off when it's time for sleep. Because shitty sleep + crazy tumult = even crazier tumult and scattering of the brain.

I'm just praying that, as things work out- like they always do- I can keep myself together.
If you'll excuse me, I'm going to hide from life today and try to get a little peace.

refreshed

Just when I get to feeling really lost and kinda detached from things, I get a late-night phone call from Chris that snaps me back into feeling good about things. He's just as excited as I am about what's going on in two months. It's hard to remember that when we don't talk and there's no one to share the excitement. But he just fits right in where he's supposed to in the scheme of things and completely fills every doubt that I've been having.

And, he's given me advice about some important life-changing things that I expected him to give; but it feels so much better to actually hear it from him.

So continues this saga. 

You know what?

You know what? Literally in the last 48 hours I've realized something. Plans are made to be messed up.
If every plan I ever made went through as I thought it would without a hitch, I would be in a very different place, a very different person.

The thing about plans is, they're always changeable. And that's a good thing. We adapt.

See, I made plans for how my life would go a long time ago. Some have gone through to completion, albeit with a few detours, and some have just flat-out tanked. Sometimes, I simply changed my mind. No matter what the journey or the outcome, or how I reacted at the time, I always eventually look back and feel glad that it happened that way.

Sometimes when plans change, the choice is made for you. Sometimes, you make that choice.

Yeah, I had specific plans about how my wedding would go.

But you know what? I chose to change those plans. He may have changed my plans when he chose to propose, but I'm the one who chose to say yes when he asked me to marry him. (As if I had a choice- I don't know if you can call it a choice when every fiber of your being screams, "Hell motherfucking YES!" while all your voice can do is whisper, "Yeah.")

I knew my plans would not be able to stay the same. And that's okay. I'm pretty darn happy with that choice. I chose to adapt my plans to meld with his. I feel like that's part of what marriage is.

And yeah I had a moment of pity when I got overwhelmed and thought back about my plans. About the traditional things you do to prepare for a wedding. When I think about it a little more, I don't really care about going through the motions. I think it's mostly about missing him, and nothing can change that.

Because you know what? I'm thrilled to be planning my simple little courthouse wedding, with my simple lace dress, with my favorite people in the world around me, and my "something blue" by my side. I'm so damn excited I can hardly stand it. I get to marry him.

I don't feel like I'm missing anything. If all the other stuff happens, like when we "plan" to have a big wedding in a couple years, that's cool. If not, that's cool too. It's not a requirement for me. It's just a plan. To be honest, I'm looking forward to living my life with him more than anything else.

I'm starting a new chapter of my life in a few months. That wasn't always the plan. But I'll tell you right now, if given the chance, I wouldn't change any of it.

I really enjoyed this

Organizing my thoughts

Please excuse the SUPER WHINE in the last post.

Suzy, this is why I love you. You tell me when to simplify things when they've gotten out of hand. Bottom line is, I'm going to marry that toot and whatever else happens, happens. 

At the very least, I have decided what I want, and I'm going to do my best to make it happen.

At the top of the list, I want my friends to be at my wedding. We were going to keep it small and just have family there, but regardless if we have a big reception later on, I want my besties by my side on this special day. So the guest list is decided. I have checked with the Justice of the Peace, and there is enough room. Yay!

Next is the date. I have a pretty good idea, just need to fine-tune it.

I made a bunch of calls and got a ton of questions answered, so that actually eases a lot of the stress.

Things are moving along quite swimmingly.

wedded stress

I'm becoming increasingly frustrated with wedding planning.

I'm getting opinions from everybody except who matters most, from all angles, and it's overwhelming. I don't even know what I want anymore! Maybe I need to sit down and figure that out again and go from there.

Regardless, I need to get on the ball. Questions need to be answered before I can continue making these tentative plans. It's like, stress city over here. My sister has been incredibly helpful with logistics, but she can't provide his opinion. I'm getting married to a guy who's just going to suddenly show up for it all. Which is actually pretty accurate. Lucky guy. I want to just show up too! (Haha.)

And since we hardly talk, I'm scared that we won't be on the same page about important things like finances and the future, and you know, normal shit people talk about before they get married. I know we'll figure it out eventually, but it's just kinda hanging over my head.

It's exciting because he's coming home and I'm planning my wedding, but at the same time it's making me sad. It's missing something.

I wanted all the traditional fun things that my friends all had. The engagement party, the pictures, the pretty invitations, the registry & the showers...  everyone else gets that period of fun and love and making memories. I'm not trying to compare my life to everyone else's, but I always thought I'd get to experience those things. Honestly, I don't even know if I'll care about that stuff 5 years from now, but it seems overrated until you don't get it.

I know it's not about the wedding; it's about the marriage. I know our marriage will be wonderful, but I can't help but feel like I'm missing out. You know?

I know once the stress of planning is over and he's actually home I'll be over the moon and I won't feel any of these feelings except excitement and I won't care about anything else. That's kinda what he does; erases the stress.

I can't wait for that.
There's nothing a little squeeze from Chris can't fix.

yay payday?

So you all pretty much know that my job sucks and I drag myself out of bed in the morning solely for the paycheck.

So imagine my pending conniption-fit when I go to deposit my paycheck this afternoon after a long-ass day at work and the bank won't take it.

Not to mention it's been a pain in the ass for months since they stopped offering direct deposit because of some computer glitch.

Long story short, after numerous phone calls and over the course of 2.5 hours, I had to end up driving to the bank that my company uses, get them to verify it and cash it (for a $7 charge since I don't have an account there), and take it back to my bank and deposit it.

Can you say bull shit??

If this happens next payday, I don't know what I'm going to do.

I work outtt

Today I exercised.

Rain threatened my nice brisk walk, so instead I did (look familiar, ash?):

Once. One time. Not 3-5. Bitches be crazy.

Then I did about 15 of these:

Felt the burn.

Then I cooled down for a few minutes because I was about to have a heart attack, and did some of these:

Balancing on the ball was fun. I fell off a few times. Glad only the cat was watching.

My day has officially been made

Theme of my life

Therefore, the theme of this blog.

Apparently I'm not the only one, haha

shopping & skeeters

What a lovely day yesterday. Spend the afternoon with my mom and sister.

Next shopping project: I need to find proper undergarments for my city hall wedding dress. It's basically a very sheer dress with a lace overlay. I didn't realize how sheer until I brought it home. A slip would solve the problem, but it is a spaghetti strap and nothing's tackier than a bunch of straps hanging out.

A strapless bra is a must. So I figured something like this would work. I tried one on and realized the problem pretty quickly. In order to find a bra that is supportive, I have to go with a 32inch back. That leaves me stuffed into the rest of the garment like a 2 lb sausage in a 1 lb bag. If I go any bigger, I lose support.

I am currently considering buying a strapless bra separately (because I really need one anyway) and trying to find something like this to wear as well. I don't really want to be feeling suffocated the whole time so I can get one that's a little less tight but still does the job of a slip. I have to figure out where to buy these things.

Also, I need to find some lace to wear as a sash. I bought some white lace, but it turns out the dress is slightly ivory. Also, I need shoes. That's the fun part!

It's going to take a day of running around town with my dress in tow to get everything taken care of.

My evening was spent at Constellation Field. Sugar Land recently got a baseball team, the Skeeters. I've been wanting to go, and Missy found out that our high school dance team was performing, so we got tickets through them.

I gotta say, I'm very impressed. The stadium is very nice. They even have a kid's area with a water park and a carousel around the outfield. The stadium is small enough that all of the seats are good, and all tickets are very reasonably priced. Not like when you go see the Astros and you pay 40 bucks and can still barely make out the players on the field.

We sat just past the 1st base line, and got to see all the players warming up. By the way, pretty much all of the players are attractive. Was that a requirement for being on the team? Kuz I'm not complaining.
Also, because it's minor league, many of the players stopped and chatted with the fans before the game, signed autographs for kids, threw balls into the crowd, and were really nice and personable.

To make the evening complete, a cool front came through. It was perfect weather for being outdoors. Top it all off with a 5-minute drive home. I couldn't have asked for a better combination!

When they aren't playing baseball games, the stadium is going to be used for other events, like concerts. How cool is that?

ripped my pants

Oh yeah, today at work I split my pants.

On the butt.

I had lifted something heavy and set it down by squatting. Then I heard the sound of stitches ripping. At first I thought it was just my lab coat but then I looked and it was my butt.

I was amused. It really didn't matter because I had my lab coat on, and then after work the 2-minute walk to my car wasn't so bad because I was wearing red underwear anyway. (That makes more sense if I tell you I was wearing red scrubs).

Gahh

I rushed after work to run an errand and I got there three minutes past closing time. One of those "GAHH" moments. That's ok, I'll go back tomorrow. Or, get mom to do it for me during the day ;o).

I think I'm getting closer to finding an acne solution. Face is clearing up. Chest is clear. Back is on its way as well. Before I get too excited, let's see how it's working in a few weeks.

I want to throw stuff away. My de-clutter motion a few weeks back was thwarted by lounging around.

And, God forbid I take a shower or leave my phone for a second, because then I'll miss my chance to talk to Chris for another 2 weeks. Hmph.

P.S. Another charge from United Airlines has placed my credit card back out of "Paid-In-Full" status. Guess whose cute fiance's plane tickets home are purchased?? MINE!

ASL

I've wanted to learn sign language for a very long time. I learned a few signs and the alphabet when I was living with Barbara at UH, who was deaf, but her hearing aid made it so easy to communicate that I never gave it much more effort. Especially when I was trying to earn a degree and all.

But it's always been on the LIST, and today I did a quick search and came across this site, lifeprint.com, which is very organized and super easy to learn.

Now, it's pretty difficult to learn a language all by yourself with no one to talk to. I think if you're reading this, you should give it a shot. Then we can practice together! (I've already completed lesson 1, and I really enjoyed it)