flashing lights

I have no clean spoons.

This will be a problem tomorrow morning when it gets to be cereal-eating time.

I was all set to do the dishes, when I happened to glance over here at Lappy and remembered I have a story. So dishes will wait, or possibly get postponed until tomorrow morning when I wash a single spoon for cereal-eating purposes. Or I'll use a plastic spoon. *shrug*

This morning I got pulled over.
That's right, at 4-o'freaking-clock in the morning.

I was turning out of my neighborhood, and I saw the cop sitting there at the intersection, one of those killer whales. I see them on this particular stretch of road a lot, especially early in the morning.

So I made sure to come to a complete stop before I turned right on red. I always glance in the rear view mirror when I pass a cop, and I saw him start driving. Fuck.
Still driving, looking in the rear view mirror, he got up right behind me. Fuck.
Lights come on. Fuck, man.
Racking my brain, I realize I did not use my blinker when I made the turn. Do people really get pulled over for that? Maybe I had a headlight out.

So I pulled into a parking lot and he comes to the window. I roll it down.
BAM flashlight all up in my face. I squint, "Good morning."

"I'm officer so-and-so. License and proof of financial responsibility, please."

As I reach for my wallet he asks where I work. I tell him, and he asks where that is. I tell him that, too. Making conversation? Or making sure I'm not a secret druggie/ serial killer/ arms dealer/ rapist disguised in a cute hair bow and scrubs and a pink sweater?

I hand him my license as he asks me if I know why I was pulled over. I tell him, "No I'm not sure why," as I start to reach towards the glovebox for my insurance card. Silently hoping that I remembered to throw the current one in there.

He tells me, "You didn't use your blinker when you turned," Blast. He keeps going, "and you turned into the left-hand lane."

Derr, what? I vaguely remember some obscure page in the driver's ed handbook that mentioned that rule about having to turn into the right-hand lane when making a right on red. Oops. I made a kind of exasperated, "I'm such a tard" noise like I knew about that rule all along and I can't believe I broke it, as I dug through my glove box... and finally pulled out the insurance card.

He doesn't even take it. He hands me back my license, says something I didn't really catch, and gets back in his car before I have a chance to say thank you in the direction of my open window.

Hm, okay. Must have had something much more important to do. My dad would say there was probably a sale on squishies at the Valero. He probably got radioed about something? Maybe a robbery or something exciting.

But, I was annoyed that I was pulled over at 4am when there's no one on the road to be a hazard to. He was just waiting there for someone to screw up. Like forgetting to use a blinker. I'm so damn dangerous. (In hindsight, how could I forget to use my blinker?? There was a cop RIGHT THERE! Geez.)

And also, don't waste either of our time if you're not going to ticket me, or give me a warning, or whatever. Not that I wanted a ticket, but why did he even bother?
Maybe I was going to get a ticket and I just got lucky. I wonder how much a ticket for that would cost?

Maybe he was just bored and curious about what type of person is driving around at 4am, not using their blinkers and turning into left-hand lanes.

In that case, I probably deserved it.