30 September 2011


Sweet potato fries. whatWHAT get in my belly.

There was a point at work this morning where it got so bad that I wanted to sit down the middle of the lab and just cry. Like a two year old, defeated. I seriously considered it for a brief second, but then I remembered that I do want to keep my job. And that I'm also supposed to be an adult.

This afternoon I mentioned it to my boss and she said, "I know how you feel." Word. At least she's right there with me in this nonsense.

The Victoria's Secret credit card bill comes in a pink envelope. Doesn't make it any cuter when I have to pay it-- but my underwear drawer is that much more baller. It's a tie.

Some asian lady stole my purse today.
Ok. Let me clarify. They were having a killer sale on Coach purses at Dillard's and Ashley called to give me the heads up. So I was looking at one that caught my eye- normal subdued brown with the Cs on the ouside, with PURPLE lining. I could see myself becoming smitten.

I asked the saleslady to unlock it from the rack so I could see how it looked on my shoulder. As I was doing that, two asian ladies walked up and... lingered.  As I was handing it back to the saleslady/ putting it back on the rack, they practically snatched it from our hands and wanted to buy it.

Okayyy. If I was feeling feisty, I would have fought over it. But I was tired after a long bullshitty day at work and just let her take it. She obviously needed that purse more than I did. So no Coach bag for me. At least not today.

Instead I went over to the Proactiv kiosk and forked over 50 bucks. Let this be the end of zits!! *shakes fist*

Also- DUDE, everyone is pregnant. This time, it's not people that I actually know, but it seems like every blog I follow is pregnant, or trying to get pregnant.

I just got season 1 of  How I Met Your Mother from Netflix.
Guess which party animal is going to watch as much as I can tonight before I fall asleep?
This one.

27 September 2011

The letter P

I was looking forward to my first payday where I don't have to put the majority of it into paying off my credit card... I forgot that my 6-month car insurance payment is due. Cripes. Oh, well. NEXT payday!

Also, for the first time in literally years, I forgot to read PostSecret on Sunday. It's been my weekly ritual for years and I can't believe I missed it! I realized it today and quick checked it out. It's just not the same if it's not over Sunday morning coffee.

Also, I just got an email full of pictures of Colin Farrell's dick. Apparently he's the newest celebrity to come out with a sex tape... Is it just me or does it look kinda crooked? Hahahaha my coworker is awesome.

I'm beat. Not much substantial sleep last night either.

BUT I got to eat some pretty delicious pie for dinner.

Also, I got this song stuck in my head today. Actually, I started singing it in the lab and my coworkers started singing along. Reason # 26 why my coworkers rock. Anyway, it put me in the mood to watch Moulin Rouge. Also, Damn Ewan McGregor is one sexy man. He needs to make a sex tape.

This was a strange post. Payments, PostSecret, Penis, Poor sleep, Pie, and... Moulin Rouge.

26 September 2011

pie & excitement

Lime pie in the fridge. I tasted the filling before I washed the dishes...
Oh, I'm going to eat that whole damn thing.

Really sleepy today. Chris called last night just as I was finally drifting off to sleep.

He started talking about making vacation plans and fun things to do (besides him- OH!) while he's on leave, and got me all excited (not in that way, you nasty). So I didn't fall asleep until some time between 11 and midnight. I will sleep well tonight, though, as long as I don't think about him coming home.
Two months... Gah! It will totally make up for last year when I was all mopey about spending Christmas apart.

So anyway, I was going to post about something other than pie and hunky marines coming home, but now I forgot.

25 September 2011

Sunday morning musings

Best Harry Potter themed birthday party ever.

We got sorted by the sorting hat, played games for house points, ate in the great hall, enjoyed gluten free cake (seriously that gets me every time), played kinect, and ended up with some hilarious rounds of Things.
Things that are hard to find? Answers included: yourself, the other sock, and horcruxes. Good times.

While shopping at Walmart with Missy the other night, I ended up with my coveted bumblebee halloween costume. For years I've wanted to be a bumblebee for halloween, but it just never happened. THIS year, it's on.

Of course it looks a little different on the model... mine's a little looser, and I feel like I'm wearing a bumblebee-themed bathing suit from the 1920s.

Maybe I could sexy it up with some fishnets or something... or maybe this year I don't have to be slutty for halloween. Novel concept, I know. We all know that Halloween is the one night of the year the average girl gets to dress slutty without judgement. You're in a bra and panties? It's okay as long as you've got fairy wings.

Bottom line: If I've finally got my bumblebee costume, someone needs to throw a party.

Today, key lime pie is going to happen. Well, first the graham crackers need to happen. We'll see how far I get.

24 September 2011

no scurvy here

Last week I took home a bunch of limes handed down from Ashley's mother-in-law, to Ashley, to me.

Sitting in my fridge was doing them no good, so I squeezed them.

I ended up with over 2 cups of lime juice, so I think it's pretty mandatory that I make key lime pie- even if they technically aren't key limes. A quick search on the internets and I realized that it's no more than lime juice, condensed milk, and eggs. No idea it was so easy.

Also, I have enough lime juice to make 4 pies, which is obviously not happening. Anyone want any lime juice?

I also get to make some graham crackers for the crust, but not today. I've got a Harry Potter themed birthday party to attend :o)

23 September 2011

girl crush

Dude, I'm sorry but Taylor Swift is absolutely fucking gorgeous.

21 September 2011


Jen has asked me to write a guest blog about my experience at work the other day.

So. I go to lunch as usual and when I walk in the break room I sit down at an empty table by the microwave. There are a few people in the room with me, no big.

I microwave my food and am minding my own business when I am approached by a co-worker who tells me that when I am finished, she would like to sit in my spot. This is not the first time she has asked me this and normally she goes and sits down and waits for me to leave. (which usually happens to be about 30 minutes before I actually am finished with my lunch break).

However, on this particular day that is not what happened.

I had finished eating, but was not yet ready to get up and leave as I was still searching the web on my phone and relaxing as well as waiting for Jen to come up there so we could shop on the rest of my break.

I don't suppose she had too much patience this day because she decided to come and sit next to me with her weird powdered tea and banana. My things were sprawled out on the table because, well, for the next 20 minutes or so it WAS my table. However, as she was running out of room to put her things I attempt to move my lunchbox and she says "no, it's ok you can leave it there".

uhm. Bitch, I KNOW it's ok because I was sitting here first but I'm not about to have you spill your tea shit all over my things.

Then she proceeds to have a conversation with the woman in FRONT of me - whose table was just as empty as mine, with as many empty seats by the way - and eat her banana. Now, she is one of those women who thoroughly enjoys eating with her mouth open and talk at the same time in her weird language and I feel like I should mention the disgusting nature of being near anyone who is eating a banana.

It sounds disgusting. It sounds like someone attempting to eat hard food when they have no teeth and they just - gum the fucking thing until it becomes the consistency of baby food. And then, it gives this odd after-smack sound of someone who has just gulped down a generous amount of milk and is trying to get the film of dairy out of their mouth.

So, needless to say I am utterly disgusted and amazed at the audacity of this woman who has taken over what was supposed to be my relaxing break. Thankfully, Jen called shortly after she started to ingest her banana and I left.

I just don't get some people.  

20 September 2011

taking advantage

Got really pissed today.

Already vented to Dayna, so the point is moot at the moment- because the purpose of venting is to make you feel better and I already did that. Now the rage has subsided and I'm still seriously peeved at the situation, but not enough to describe again the source of my anger.

I'll just get pissed off all over again, and the paranoia of the unlikely chance that it will come back to bite me in the ass should the right person ever read a post detailing the issues I have with this company... leads me to reason that it's probably better left off the internet. {Damn that's a great run-on sentence. Bite me.}

What am I taking from this? I see my path clearly.
Now just to wait and see how it merges with others' paths.

18 September 2011

party rock

Ummm I'm totally a fan of this commercial- even if the hamster has a fupa.


A couple of months ago I gave my credit card to my mom to hide so I wouldn't use it while I was trying to pay it off.

Today, I got it back. That's right, zero dollar balance. It's sucked not having extra spending money and looking at double digit bank account balances for a few months, but it's worth it.

Also, Hello, Netflix.

Also, I woke up today with the worst cramps I've had since I hit puberty. What the hell, body?


Also, this is strangely cute, especially at the end.

17 September 2011


So Ashley got me this game, The Game of Things, for my birthday a few years ago, and it was around the time that my social life plunged and my studying soared, so it's been sitting in the game drawer for a while.
Last night I finally played it at Scott & Dayna's, and it was a lot of fun! It's definitely going to be thrown into the rotation whenever we do eventually have game nights. Or the power goes out, or we have another hurricane. (which, I might not mind considering the drought and the stress level at work.)

Still trying to get my skin to clear up. I changed cleansers and started using the same one I used back when I hit puberty. It cleared up a little, but doesn't seem to be solving the problem. Sooo I took advice from my sister and got a Clarisonic, which I love. It exfoliates gently and leaves my skin feeling smooth and soft. So I'll add it to the rotation and give it a while to work.

I also realized that I've been using the same makeup for years. And I figured my brushes were probably in need of a cleaning. So I cleaned my brushes, threw out the old stuff and got brand new stuff. While I was at it, I took the opportunity to clean out/ organize my makeup. I wear very little makeup, especially now since I wake up so early and spend all day hidden in the lab. For a girl who doesn't wear makeup, I sure have a lot of it. So I grabbed some wine, parked it on the floor, and dumped the entire drawer out.

I discovered that I had kept makeup from dance team- really, who honestly uses that color blush? I had so much shimmer powder that I'd never get a chance wear it all. I had purple lipstick... that smelled funny. I filled my trash can halfway, and kept the things I thought I'd use again. I ended up with all this, organized neatly back into the drawer.

So. New cleanser, new Clarisonic, new makeup. Less zits. Hopefully.

If that doesn't work, I'll start using Proactiv again. I like/dislike Proactiv. I've used it before and it works to clear up breakouts, but it also makes me really shiny and I don't like the texture of my skin when I use it. And it's pretty pricey.

Does anyone else have any advice for me? It's ridiculous that I'm 26 and breaking out like I'm 16. Come ON.

12 September 2011

piss on that

I didn't wake up this morning and think to myself, "I think I'll be pissy today." But, I've managed to be in a crabsauce mood all day anyway. Trying to get myself out of it. Here we go.

Little things to love:

1. Freshly laundered rugs. Especially the bathroom rugs, because they come out of the dryer all fluffy and they're not mashed down yet, and when you step out of the shower you're like, "OMG fluffy" and you kind stand there for a second taking in the fluffiness with WAY too much happiness.

2. Piles of chocolate chip waffles, for the second week in a row.

3. Changing something around and the cat's all, "You changed something? Why did you change this? I must investigate. I don't like this change. OMG CHANGE!" *tear around the room in a cat frenzy before settling down on the couch and going to sleep*

4. This:

Ok so here's the deal. There was a youtube video here. I had drafted part of this post yesterday and I finished it up today. However, right before I hit "Publish," I accidentally deleted the video that I had embedded. And I have absolutely NO IDEA what video it was. At all. Not even a little bit- I'm totally blank. But apparently I loved it enough yesterday to include it as a little thing to love. If I ever figure out what it was, I'll totally clue you guys in. But for now... nada. 

11 September 2011


I was a senior in high school. I had the first two periods off, so I was getting ready for school. We always kept news on the tv in the mornings, which I usually ignored. When I passed by the living room on the way to the kitchen, I glanced at the tv. They were showing footage of the first tower, and I thought it looked interesting so I stopped and grabbed the remote to turn the volume up. It didn't hit me immediately- I figured it was some tragic accident or explosion and I didn't even realize a plane had flown into the building.

As I was watching and in the process of turning up the volume, the second tower was hit. Um... what? That's a little strange. I called mom, who was in her room, telling her she needed to see this. She came out and we sat there and watched in silence, letting the story sink in. Then my boyfriend at the time arrived to take us to school, and he hadn't heard anything yet, so we watched the news for a few minutes before we left. I don't know why we went- we did nothing but watch the news all day in every class. Over and over, we saw the footage. It's still surreal to watch it.

Oh, God. Can you imagine the horror of the passengers on the planes? I remember thinking how I'd feel if I was one of the people on the airplanes, taking a normal flight, reading Sky Mall, wondering if this is the time I'm really going to order the enormous crossword puzzle- and in an instant the crossword puzzle doesn't mean shit and I'm fearing for my life.

How I'd feel if it was my family member on the plane, calling me to tell me they were going to die and they loved me.
How about the people in the towers, working a normal day one second and surrounded by carnage the next? The helpless terror.
The full magnitude of what happened has never really hit me. The lives, the people, our country. We take our safety for granted, and that day I was incredibly thankful for my life.
I can't believe it's already been ten years.

10 September 2011


I slept so incredibly soundly last night.
Was woken up this morning by a phone call from Chris. Enjoyed a decent conversation- it's been a while. Man I miss him. They find out Sep 21st when they're coming home.

I got this text from Ashley last night with the message: I got takeout from Jade Cafe

It's hard to read, but once I got it I laughed really hard for a good 5 minutes. You can't make this shit up, haha

Also, I have none of these.

09 September 2011


This post is not for me. *cough*ashley*cough*

Today. The boss, though we love her, was off today, so the new guy busted out his smart phone and pulled up Pandora. He placed it on the STAT rack and we jammed. It was very nice. I miss having music in the lab. I mean, I know that my random outbursts of singing the songs in my head are awesome (ha!), but real music... it really makes the job more pleasant, especially when things get stressful. And not going to even mention the new stressors we were faced with today. Keep on keepin' on.

I got an email from one of my many subscriptions, and literally laughed out loud at this recipe:  Boxed Wine Cupcakes.

How deliciously trashy! However, I'm not going to waste perfectly good wine in cupcakes. Someone try them and tell me how they taste.

Moving on...

Stumbled upon this gem while perusing the interwebs this week:  Beyonce. Another literal lol. The picture of the chicken at the front door really made me lose it, probably because I can see my mom or my sisters doing this.

Pretty beat. And the cat just came in covered in dirt. Time to deliver a whore shower.

PS. It was pretty trippy to drive through Bastrop last weekend, only to discover a few hours later that it was on fire. While driving we did note that the land was dry and crispy, and it wouldn't take much to light up the fields of (essentially) kindling. And all those homes... tragic.

06 September 2011


I really miss my Suzy Bear!
and I'm hungry but don't know what to make for dinner. There's no food in the fridge. Except for a block of cheese and some chicken broth & milk-- both questionable.

I really want nachos from Eduardo's, but am too lazy and don't want to get out of my workout clothes. And also I don't really want to feel like a fatty with indigestion.


05 September 2011


chocolate chip waffles (enough for a week of second breakfasts)

naps with kitty

and not much else

04 September 2011


What a freaking day.

Woke up at 7, packed the majority of Suzy's stuff into my car and dad's truck, drove the 150 miles to Austin, unpacked both vehicles, carried it all up to the 3rd floor, got back in our cars, and drove another 150 miles back to home. And my dad likes to take the ass-backwards country roads in lieu of the main freeways, so it was a bunch of winding roads that felt like I was going nowhere. It would have been great on a nice Sunday drive, but not when you've got shit to do and 300 miles to drive.

It wasn't all that bad, but a few things really made the day trying.
It's over a hundred degrees outside. And I felt every degree of it, with every stair I climbed. I swear I could feel my heart beating in every single blood vessel. Talk about a workout!
It's also incredibly windy. I had to keep my hands glued to the steering wheel and constantly fighting to keep the car on the road. For 300 miles. That's a lot of freaking miles.
I came home stiff, sore, sweaty, and with a headache.

But oh my gosh. That is the cutest little apartment; it's really really nice. And I can't wait to see what she does with it. And no, we didn't get to see her because it's rush week and she was out doing rush-type things.
So we set up her bed so that when she came home she'd have a nice bed made all up with freshly washed sheets. That's pretty much the only thing we unpacked, and I made sure to set the ice maker to make ice before we left, because nobody likes an empty ice bucket. I'm so excited for her- her first apartment. And by the way, I'd kill right now for her tub. It's one of those deep ones that are great for bubble baths. And it was clean... much cleaner than any of the tubs I have access to now.

Other things I did this weekend.

Me and Akhtar hit up IKEA and I got a new desk chair, as well as a duvet cover that I'd been eyeing the last time we were there and was still thinking about it months later. The thread count sucks but it's so pretty.

Then I asked Akhtar to come over and help me put the chair together. Except I got all excited and would up putting it together myself and not really letting him help, haha. He supervised and made sure I didn't put the parts on backwards... which I almost did. I love it. It's got support and cushion, which the old hand-me-down I was using before seriously lacked.

Anyway. I'm tired. Hope something good is on tv so I can zone out for a while.

03 September 2011


Last night I had another dream that I was getting married.

My dad knows a guy whose family owns a wedding planning business and they are currently filming a reality show. If you want to participate in the show, they pay for and plan your wedding. Then you get to be on tv.

So my dad was telling me about it and he was like, "Heyyyy if you want to get married any time soon, this is what's up. And you know they [america.. the people who own the company... the producers?] LOVE military weddings."

Me on a reality show? Getting married? Probably will not happen, but I guess the seed for another strange dream was planted.

In my dream I was getting married the next day and I, for some reason, was having my bachelorette party with only my mom at some hotel pool. And she wanted to make it all crazy but I was tired because I'd worked all day. I was a wet blanket at my own damn bachelorette party! And why was I suddenly friend-less and sister-less?? At least my mom's got my back, haha.

So then flash forward to later that night when the party never really happened. I was in a hotel room with my fiancee and we started getting busy.

Except his moves were really not doing it for me, so I went to the bathroom. I noticed the door had this neat feature where you could push a button and there was a tv that basically acted like a two-way mirror- I could see into the room but he could not see me. So I pushed it and apparently my fiancee was my ex Robert, who was, at the moment, picking at a zit on his arm. Oh, what the fuck.

I was horrified and couldn't remember exactly how I had wound up in this situation. So I went back out into the room and tried to break off the engagement, but it wouldn't stick. Like, I'd say that we were breaking up but then a few seconds later the universe rewound and we were engaged again.

So I called Collin to come help me out, and a few seconds later he was knocking at the door. Brother-in-law to the rescue! I grabbed my shit and got the hell out of there, and then in real life pumpkin started meowing for food so I woke up.

I can see the obvious theme, but I don't really know why I'm having these dreams. Or why I'm paired up with people who I'd never, ever be with.

Why can't I be dream-marrying Ewan McGregor? Damn that man is sexy.

01 September 2011

dodged a dreamy bullet

Last night I had a dream that I got engaged.

But not with who you might think.

I dreamed that my sister's friend proposed to me out of nowhere, and he was dead serious. And I had to say yes because it was a very public proposal, and it was in front of all his friends - and I didn't want to embarrass him. I figured I'd say yes at that moment, then say no later in private-- and give back the huge diamond ring. But some event (that I can't remember what it was) made being married to him seem like it'd be a good idea. Maybe it was the huge ring? I jest...

In my dream I remember wondering why he was proposing, because he doesn't even know me. But for some reason it was very serious and it was so real. The weird thing is, in real life (and in the dream), I have never even said more than a few words to the guy, and he's got his own serious girlfriend. And he's not even that great of friends with my sister. But here I was, engaged to someone I don't know and considering actually marrying him. Strange indeed.
I am quite glad I was not engaged when I woke up, haha.

Also, I got through the day by having periodic dance parties while singing this. I'm so glad I have kickass coworkers that participate in my spontaneous and celebratory dance parties. Finished a phlebotomist's rack full of tubes? Dance party. Found a lost tube? Dance party. With a little bit of the Whoop Whoop that got stuck in my head 5 years ago when I caught the Wendy Williams show one morning at the oil change place and never really got it out of my head. Computers back up and running? Dance party. You get the idea- dance party in the lab. whoop whoop...