31 May 2010

pumpkin & freedom

I've been craving pumpkin pie. It's so creamy, delicious and cold, and actually kind of good for you, when you make it right.

It takes about 10 minutes to whip one up and throw it in the oven. So tell me why it's 3 days later and there's no pumpkin pie.

Because I can't find canned pumpkin in the stores! It's not like they ONLY carry pumpkin around Thanksgiving, right? Right?
Because if that's the case then next year I'm stocking up on canned pumpkin so when my late-May pumpkin pie craving hits I can indulge.

I WILL be going to a bbq today. Everyone seems on the fence about having one. But I WILL find one and bring some sort of red white and blue dessert. Just to bring the dessert and make it cute.

Even if it's not pumpkin pie.

And let's not forget the reason that it's a dreaded Monday and I'm sitting here in my pjs leisurely drinking my coffee and talking about afternoon bbqs.

I think everyone knows someone in the service, or at least knows someone who knows someone in the service.
Over here we've got the cousin & the cousins' husbands (they seem to like those military men!) in Iraq and Afghanistan, along with a few of my friends who are either there now or have been there, or have been there and are going back again. I know a guy whose wife just had a baby, and he had to leave them in the hospital to head back to Afghanistan. We know plenty of veterans, including close family friends. And then there's Chris, who's still in training, and Luke's friend who just signed up.

And then there's the heroes who lost or gave their lives, and this day is especially for them. You can't turn on the tv, open a web browser, or read the newspaper without some kind of tribute to our men and women in uniform, and that's the way it should be.

So today when you're enjoying your day off, take a second to think about why.

And make red white and blue desserts :o)

30 May 2010

time turner

I had a dream last night that I had the ability to go back in time. I think it came from yesterday when I was watching Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban where Hermione had the time turner.

Anyway, in my dream I managed to get stuck back in time 10 years ago. I thought about all the things that have happened in that period, (college again?? NOOOOO!!!!!) and all the important events, and if I would change any of them. It was so real, and in my dream this is what I came up with:

  • Start eating gluten free, and hopefully avoid the major symptoms that started developing my senior year of high school
  • Have more confidence in everything I did.
  • I'll know what major I picked, so I won't change it the end of my junior year and have to spend 7 years in school.
  • I would have handled my relationships differently. I still would have dated who I dated, but I would have broken things off sooner with the ones who didn't work out, instead of letting it die a long, slow death.
  • I would have gone to California and visited my grandma in Wisconsin more.
  • There were a few fights that were unnecessary and did more harm than good. Would have held my tongue.
There you have it, that's the major things. Man, imagine what I would have accomplished if I had not had stomachaches all the time, had graduated 3 years ago with confidence that took me 10 years to develop, hadn't wasted time on crappy relationships, traveled more, and been more supportive instead of criticizing.

Heh, too bad it was only a dream!

Things always happen for a reason.

29 May 2010

gym antics

Yoga at 11am on a Saturday.

I'd go, but I know how horribly crowded it will be. People breathing hard all around me in a stuffy room... ugh. The other day I was working out on a machine and I could smell the lady's breath next to me. Fucking GAG. I had to move. Nasty.

I've been realizing lately just how much people in general and crowds annoy me. Actually who am I kidding; I've known for a while.
A Person can be smart, but People are fucking idiots. And it does depend on the circumstances.

Graduations? horrible. Concerts and festivals? not so bad. Crowds at the mall or grocery store? shoot me. It seems that once people walk into the mall or grocery store, they lose all regard for others around them.

Enough of my intense dislike for large amounts of people gathered in one place at one time. Especially when they're trying to drive somewhere...

Frank is going to get a gym membership for the summer and I'm going to make him show me how to do some of the more complicated-looking machines and conquer my insecurities involving the "boy's area" with the free weights.
I just don't even know what I'd do if I went over there. If I had any cajones or flirting skills, I'd ask one of the boys working out there for some advice, but we all know that's not going to happen.

I'm considering the idea of hiring a personal trainer for a few weeks once I start making money. You know, to kick-start really getting in shape. I've been watching some of the things the trainers have people do and been copying them ;o).
Since I've been working out regularly, I've been feeling really good. Hardly any stomach aches, which is probably due to the fact that once I've worked out, my appetite for eating junk really drops.

It's really helped that I've kept track of my workouts on a calendar. I like the visual of seeing how often (or not often) I've been active. In May I've worked out on average 2-3 times a week.

I'm curious to see if these changes will affect my lipid panels, which I still have not done... Fasting just does not work very well for me.

28 May 2010


Restless dreams last night = not much sleep.
Tired today. I miss that boy.

It's not so bad, it's just these random days that make it a little suckier.
Honestly I can see him kicking ass at this.

Wonder how things are going to work themselves out.

Oh, BTW: Frank talked me into creating a skype account, where we linked it to facebook and discovered that the boy had like three different accounts. For what reason? No idea, haha. But it was definitely fun screwing around with skype and I need a webcam!

26 May 2010

over the hump

Dear kettle corn,

Please stop making me stuff you into my piehole.



I discovered tonight that I could do one of those clapping pushups. You know, like hardcore buff men do. Actually, I can do two. Whatwhat that's what's up.

Tonight Modern Family was not on because they had stupid Transformers on tv. Gaysauce.

Oh, and WTF. No, really, WTF.

The New Years scene in the Sex and the City movie makes me melancholy. That lady's voice is awesome. I want a sparkly hat like that.

25 May 2010

1 more tiiiime

Have this song in my head from working out.

Reminds me of line camp our senior year. How I wish I had that video to post, it's quite entertaining. Missy!- Is that possible? Let's make it happen.

What else is new? Nothing.
Tired, not exactly excited about blood bank, hungry, missing the boy, studying in my free time, wondering when I'm going to get my FREAKING financial aid check. 73 days.


Getting MUCH better at cooking fish, and I have a craving for veggies. Notice the lack of candy and popcorn. Yay me!

23 May 2010

kids, weddings, phones

Talk about instant birth control: Shit My Kids Ruined. Check it out. It's awful, and hilarious when you don't have children. Reason # 183 never to have kids.

Aileen's wedding today!
Still debating on what to wear. I have a dress I want to wear that is awesome, but I fear it may be a tad too short. It's still socially acceptable, but just shorter than what I'd normally wear to a wedding. And I want to be able to move in it, and dance without showing my ass. I love dancing at weddings.

So I have a feeling that this morning will consist of trying on every dress I own.
And finding my phone.

I swear I'm going to have to tether that thing to my body. I lose track of that damn thing constantly. It gets lost in the car, people's houses, people's cars, public restrooms, classrooms, restaurants, dressing rooms, the cushions of my couch... that phone gets around. One time (semi-recently), I left it in my scrubs and was doing laundry, and right before I was going to turn the water on, someone called and I was able to retrieve it without incident. Whew.

22 May 2010

RIP Sarge

This morning Ashley's cat Sargent was hit by a car and went to kitty heaven. We buried him in the backyard with a pouch of wet food. I'm totally bummed.

I thought he was a shithead sometimes, but he was my favorite shithead. He was also a really cool cat and a sweetheart and I'm very sad to see him go. I also can't stand to see Ashley so upset. I wish I could bring him back so she'd feel better.

Rest in peace Sargie.

19 May 2010


Today was an exciting day.

Since we stayed late in the lab until 6 yesterday, we didn't have to go in today. I slept in, made pancakes, took the cumulative exam due this week, and did surprisingly well. I still have a TON to remember for the Board of Certification in August. Been taking my huge review binder with me to bed and reading before I go to sleep. One day at a time man.

Mom and I went to the gym, and I got a really good, sweaty workout. I can still only go for about 20-30 minutes at a time before I get dizzy, but it felt good to work up a sweat and feel the burn.

When we came home, I found out that Ashley & Collin were able to move into their new apartment early, so I helped her carry boxes down to the UHAUL. More hot and sweaty-ness. After the 3rd box labeled "shoes," Collin made a comment and I told him to get used to it, haha.

Me and Luke went to check out the new place, and it's so great. Two balconies, a huge closet, lots of storage in the kitchen, a big bathtub, and overall just really nice and cute. I was so excited for her! AND, Sargeant went with them. I think I will like him more now that he's not all over the place being a little shithead.

Then, when we got back I finally got another letter from Chris. He's in a new company, Hotel company. Apparently it's notorious for being the hardest one. He said they call it "Hotel Hell." Well, he was squad leader until he fell off of a 40ft rope, but he can get the position back. Tell me why I'm not surprised that he was/is a squad leader in the hardest company. Damn right! He's also sick again with a nasty cough & cold, but apparently all the guys have it. I can only imagine how fast disease spreads there. Regardless, it was really good to hear from him.

I have a gift card for Whole Foods that needs using up, so I'm going to go and pick up some GF goodies & groceries. Modern Family comes on tonight, too.

Overall, a good day.

Oh by the way, does anyone else think this is super funny that the best scenario they could come up with for this case study is a freak lawn mower accident? LOL!

click to make bigger

18 May 2010

Ode to Suze

Suzy graduates from high school in a couple of weeks. What WHAT class of 2010!
I thought I'd sing her praises and post a couple of her senior pictures because I'M SO PROUD!

Can't believe she's gone from this:

Don't you love the little blonde waterfall ponytail?

To grown up, creative, and beautiful.

check out the family tat on the collarbone :o)

We <3 Scooter

17 May 2010


Besides the drunk 16-year-olds running screaming through the house and various other drunk-idiot-related things last night, we know how to throw a damn good party.

Yesterday was my brother Frank's 20th birthday and he had a bbq. Collin came home with a slip n slide, all excited, only to find out it was about 15 feet long and not as much fun as he remembered.

An hour later he comes over with a huge 10 x 100 feet plastic tarp from Home Depot, stakes it to the ground and pours dish soap on it. The result:

It was SO fun.

And Ashley's comments are cracking me up!

16 May 2010


It's times like these that I wish I lived in a nice, quiet apartment instead of a house full of drunk, loud, annoying high schoolers.

It was also super nice when Chris had his place just a few minutes away, especially in these circumstances.

Oy, this will NOT be happening all summer, especially with my early-ass rotations.

15 May 2010


Man, I know this feeling.

Utter exhaustion.
Bone-tired after an average day.
Can't think straight.
Random dizziness.

Damn. I picked up a list of iron-rich foods from the blood bank's donor center a few weeks ago and have been trying to eat lots of them, but I guess it's not really making a difference.

Still boycotting the nausea-inducing pills. I'll take tired over nauseous any day.

Speaking of nausea, even though I'm super-tired, my stomach has been feeling great; no problems at all. Go figure!

We had a great thunderstorm last night. I crashed hard, early. My dreams alternated between Chris at the beach and crossmatching units of blood. I gotta say, I'm getting pretty badass at blood bank. I don't think I'd choose to, but if I had to I could work in a blood bank and be confident that I wasn't going to kill someone.

Still dark and rainy today. I have to take an exam that I was supposed to take on Monday that everyone is failing. Joy! After that I think I'll nap all day.

83 days...

13 May 2010


Made some muffins tonight. I forgot how good this recipe is. YUM.

They even got Suzy to come back for more and say, "Every day, everything you make tastes less gluten free."


Still tired and not really liking my days, but I'm adjusting and it's almost Friday... and I have muffins!

You guys would be so proud of me. I've eaten like a normal person lately.
Cereal + banana for breakfast, yogurt, granola bar or apple & peanut butter for mid-morning snack, lunch-type things for lunch, and I come home and cook a real dinner instead of eating candy and popcorn.

I even planned so that I used up leftovers instead of letting them rot in the back of my fridge, and I make sure I have enough for lunch the next day. I package it all up in tupperware at the same time that I serve myself dinner.

It's becoming easier than I thought it'd be. I just have to plan.

This week's menu:

  • Cold Pasta Salad with curly noodles, spinach & red beans
  • Red Beans & Brown Rice
  • Spring Rolls made with spinach leaves instead of lettuce
  • Baked Tilapia with frozen veggies
  • Chicken on the George Foreman grill, seasoned with cumin, garlic, and thyme, paired with brown rice and leftover veggies
  • Ravioli with spaghetti sauce
  • Brown rice penne pasta with leftover chicken and spaghetti sauce
  • Fritos + bean dip with Tuesday's lunch got rid of the last small bits laying around, and bean dip does crazy things for keeping me full.
  • With the additional leftover penne and chicken, I'm thinking something like this- subbing artichoke. I have recently discovered that I love artichoke.
So that's that. It's time for another glass of wine (I've earned it!) and some Alton Brown. And BED.

What did you eat this week that I can add to next week's menu? I need inspiration!

12 May 2010

F-to the-NO

links to product info

This would scare the shit out of me. For those of you who don't know, I am terrified of someone sneaking up on me while I'm in the shower. Think about it- you're completely vulnerable in the shower.

When Chris and I first started dating, he was not aware of this. There was one instance where he came into the bathroom while I was showering just to be a goof. Of course I heard something outside the shower curtain and got freaked out. I was so pissed, I told him that if he ever did it again I'd break up with him. I don't know if he took me completely seriously, but he hasn't tried it again. When I lived with room mates, I told them I didn't mind them coming in, but just to let me know they were coming in by knocking on the door or something. I'm okay with that, it's the sneaking up on me part that's the worst.

So yeah, a shadow coming up against the shower curtain is a big N-O.

In other news, I'm completely worn out. I'm a little pissed about rotations- we're not actually in the lab, we're in a separate student lab going over stuff we've already learned how to do in student lab, slowly. I can do a type and screen and an antibody identification in an hour, and we spent all morning doing one. I hope this is not a huge waste of time and we actually learn new things. And, the lady teaching us is super uptight and micromanaging and you have to be on your game 100% of the time over stupid nitpicky things that don't even really matter. It's exhausting.

09 May 2010


Been thinking a lot about the future lately.

Not that the present is terrible; but I don't want to take it one day at a time. I want to skip ahead to the future. I have these giddy ideas of what things will be like. I don't know if they will be the way I imagine but I'm just so antsy to get through the now and get to the future.

Looking forward to so many things.
Graduating at the end of the summer. After 7 years I want it so bad I can barely stand it. I'm so close but I'm also deep-down terrified that something will fuck it up at the last minute. I am so unbelievably tired of being bogged down with schoolwork and being piss poor, watching pretty much everyone around me move forward with their lives while I'm still working on this one goal that consumes my life.

I'm ready to move on to the next chunk.

I have so many plans in my head that I'm excited to make happen. I'm not ready to admit some of them, so I just continue to look forward to the future in my head while I grudgingly take it one day at a time here in reality. When I stop to think about it though, I can't deny myself some pretty awesome "now" moments because I'm stuck in future mode. Oy, patience. I've never been patient.

Starting blood bank rotations tomorrow. Another one of those, "I have no idea what to expect" days. I've had a lot of those lately.

08 May 2010


Today's agenda:

  • Pancakes for breakfast
  • Gym or some form of exercise
  • Pedicure & manicure (got a gift certificate back in February)
  • Aileen's wedding shower!
  • Prom!

This is genius:

What are YOU doing today?

06 May 2010

food, doctors, books

Despite the horrors that induced streams of curses yesterday, I decided not to let it ruin my week, and to take it in stride. In 91 days, this will all be worth it. I hope.

Last night I found myself in Jessica's kitchen making gluten free chicken enchiladas for 8 people while Akhtar had the sides going. When I put them in the oven I realized that I really didn't know if they were going to turn out ok. I didn't follow a recipe or anything. Fortunately, they were actually pretty good. Everyone ate them and no one died. I only ate a small amount, as I was suffering from margarita-on-an-empty-stomach indigestion. Good thing I noshed on a gluten free cupcake Jessica got from Whole Foods before dinner. Man, they were delicious.

I also got a letter from Chris yesterday, which helped the mood. As soon as I took the letter out of the envelope, I was greeted with this:

Yes, I still claim him. I thought it was funny. Man I forget how much I miss him until I get a page full of his writing. He's doing well.

This morning I went and got my annual violation. Man, you never get used to that feeling. My doctor commented on my "perfect BMI," and seemed pleased that I wasn't sleeping around. You know.

She told me to start taking calcium supplements, and also wanted to run my CBC and cholesterol. You know, the ones I ran by myself in February and they were really shitty. I don't care what she says- I'm not taking statins if my cholesterol is high. My HDL is high enough for me not to worry.
Anyway, I asked if I could run them at school and avoid having to pay for them. She agreed and said I could just fax the results. Sweet.

Then I biked the 1.5 miles to the library to return a couple of books I borrowed. It's a nice morning.

The first was Crazy as Chocolate by Elisabeth Hyde. It was a good, quick afternoon read. Kinda reminded me of The Divine Secrets of the YaYa Sisterhood, what with the crazy mother that everyone kinda doesn't know what to do with.

I also got a book that's actually a collection of stories, Do The Windows Open. As soon as I opened it, I realized that I've already borrowed the book and I could never get into it the first time I borrowed it. I tried to read it again but it just wasn't catching my interest.

One out of two books grabbed from the shelf ain't bad.

Ash is putting together a garage sale for Saturday, so hopefully I can get rid of some of my extra crap lying around.

05 May 2010


My carefree week of fun has been maliciously shot down.

This summer will not be easy, or even moderately easy, or even reasonable. It's going to suck, badly. They even emailed us in the middle of our meager week of vacation instead of waiting until the end or telling us up front. I swear they did it on purpose. They're fucking evil.

Fuck everyone, man. I'm so disappointed.

And my fucking sunburn itches.

03 May 2010

sucky sunburn

I knew better.
I know that I burn easily, and I knew I was out in the sun for too long yesterday.

I have random patches of non-burned-ness, where I smeared a bit of sunscreen on my shoulders, chest and face. The rest of me is red and hurty. The middle of my chest is not burned, but the outside is, right where bra straps (or any straps) would sit. Man, I would love to own a tube top right now.

Last night I grabbed a couple of aloe vera leaves from the garden (THANK you, Missy's mom!) and stuck them in the fridge. I froze some cucumber slices and after my shower I rubbed those over the burned skin, then followed with aloe, then followed with lotion. I plan to repeat every hour or so, because I'm not going to be sunburned and uncomfortable for an extended period of time during my vacation.

I kinda don't know what to do with my free time.

02 May 2010

Weekend in pictures


Some sewing:

new heating pad cover

pj top

eating from the GARDEN!
crossing that off this year's to-do list

perfect cantaloupe

green tea from a dainty teacup

coffee reflections

special breakfast burrito (corn tortilla)
Dad ordered just for me
when he ran & got breakfast for the family

Not pictured: Happy hour margaritas, hanging w/ Akhtar & Elmer in Midtown, a TON of wine, pool + sunburn, Suzy's graduation dinner @ church.

Love vacation.

01 May 2010

Telephone 2x

Which is better? LOL

*click and open in a new window because the screen is too small on the post and cuts off the videos*

It's a close call!

wtf should I make for dinner

My new favorite website.

I have such a hard time deciding what to cook. Even with reading cooking blogs and owning 10 cookbooks, I don't seem to have much inspiration.

I can't sleep. I don't understand why- I was exhausted when I went to bed.

Maybe I'll try to figure out google reader until I get tired again.