29 November 2012


Finally! My name is officially changed on the first of many accounts. The squeaky wheel gets the grease!

Also, I think it's strange and a little uncohesive how one organization will accept a scan of a copy of the marriage license, while others require you to mail in a certified copy (they're not free, mind you), while others require you to bring in the original in person.

For instance, the social security office was fine with a certified copy, but the dmv required the original, even in the presence of a changed social security card, the certified copy, and the certificate of marriage from the JP. The ASCP was happy with a copy that I resized from the original legal size to standard size, then scanned and emailed.

I mean, clearly it's legitimate. It's not like I'm trying to go through the hassle of changing my name to trick people. It's ridiculous!

28 November 2012

part 3.

Where was I in my epic story? Oh, yes. San Antonio. We got there, checked into our hotel, and drank more champagne on the balcony overlooking the riverwalk. His sister called the hotel and upgraded our room to one with a private balcony. That was pretty cool.

I honestly don't remember what we did or when we did it. We mostly hung out at the riverwalk, drank champagne, and got a few things that Chris needs for this deployment at various manly stores around town. There was plenty of gluten free food to eat, including Little Aussie.

We also got a couples massage at the spa. We always stay at hotels with spas, but have never actually used them. I figured a honeymoon was a pretty good time to start. It was my first massage. At times it was a little uncomfortable. Overall it was nice, but I don't think I will go out of my way to get another one.

We came home on Thanksgiving day, and headed straight to Ashley's for dinner. Got to see my siblings before they all scattered again.

Since we've been home, we've pretty much stayed up late, slept late, ran errands, hung out, and caught up on Breaking Bad. It's glorious, but bittersweet because I know it will end soon.

I'm also in the process of changing my name, which is infuriating at times. The DMV can go suck a dick. I waited in line an hour and a half for them to tell me they could not use a certified copy of the marriage license that I specifically purchased from the County Clerk's office for this type of thing. It's worked everywhere else, including the social security office. Even the County Clerk's office thought that was ridiculous and sympathized with me when I called asking how to get the original back. I kinda have a short window when it comes to being able to waste two hours at the DMV, since I start my new job next week. I'll do the best I can...

That, and I have a list a mile long of crap that needs to be taken care of. But at least for now I have a hubby hanging around that makes things a little better.

Shopping buzz

Today I went shopping for work clothes, since the majority of my wardrobe consists of scrubs and t-shirts. I literally have no more business casual clothing, except for a few pairs of pants & skirts. I literally have no winter clothes, either.

I ended up with 2 sweaters, 4 long-sleeved shirts, 1 sequined tank top, 2 cardigans, 1 sweater dress, 1 pair of shoes, and 1 coffee cup for $120. I saved $95. Where? Old Navy. I love that place.

27 November 2012

Mr. and Mrs.

This is the story of the day I became a wife.

We woke up a little hazy from the booze the night before. Ate breakfast, started getting ready. Well, I mostly hung out in my robe and drank coffee.

When Ashley got here, she did my makeup while Suzy did my hair and Chris slightly stressed that we were running out of time. I assured him that it was okay- I'm the bride; I'm not late. Everyone else is just early. He was not amused.

I popped a few pepto and squeezed into my "body condom," as Chris so creatively dubbed my Spanx slip. Completed the look with an actual dress, some pearl jewelry, and my shimmery heels.

We hopped into the cars, looking really nice. My family knows how to clean up. After a short drive to the Justice of the Peace, Chris's mom handed me a gorgeous bouquet, and it was the first moment I felt like a bride.

We headed into the courtroom and waited for everyone to get there. We took a bazillion pictures, in every combination possible. Then, right on time, things got started.

We all got situated, and Chris's dad, stepdad, and grandpa stood up there with him. Dad gave me away, kissed me on the cheek, and the ceremony started.

Chris looked so handsome in his blues, but it was the expression on his face that made me tear up. He looked so comfortable, so happy, and so ready. He said his vows while holding my hands and looking at me like he truly meant what he was saying. I was overwhelmed by his sincerity and all of the happiness in the room. You could really feel it from our friends and family surrounding us, aiming their little care bear beams of happiness right at us. So, naturally, I said my vows while trying not to cry, and of course a few people videotaped it.

There was a funny part where Chris repeated something that the judge said, but he wasn't supposed to. I thought I had zoned out and was supposed to repeat it and was thinking, "Oh crap I messed up!" But it was ok. He's the one that messed up. ;o)

Shortly after the laughter, the judge officially pronounced us husband and wife. My mom cried. There were large group hugs. It was a room full of joy and I was in the middle of it with my brand spankin' new, handsome as all hell husband. Rawr.

After the ceremony was complete, we went outside where many more pictures were taken, and we headed to lunch. Lunch was meh. There was an issue with the food, but overall it was a lovely time. Toasts were made. Some were more touching and some were more funny, but they were all great. I can't believe the overwhelming generosity and well wishes of his family, my family, and our dearest friends. I have never felt more loved.

When lunch was over, we went home, packed our bags again, and headed to San Antonio for our honeymoon.

Something old: My pearls.
Something new: Dress and shoes.
Something borrowed: Mom's earrings.
Something blue: My Marine (and a blue ribbon on my bouquet)

Toot's home

Whew. I have some catching up to do. Not really feeling the "one epic post." So, I'll start at the beginning.

I met Chris at the baggage claim on Friday. There's nothing better than his smile after 7 months. There might have been some public making-out-age.

Off to Galveston! Chris reserved a fancy shmancy room at our favorite hotel, the San Luis. We were given glasses of champagne at check-in, the first of many over the course of the last week and a half.

The hotel room had a great view, nightly turndown service with pillow chocolate, room service breakfast, champagne, and a freaking tv in the bathroom mirror. I said IN the bathroom mirror. I took a picture, but Chris is standing there in a towel and I doubt he wants that on the internet. At one point during our stay, I was taking a shower and Chris barges in saying, "WHY are you not watching TV???" Of course, how silly of me. When there's a tv embedded in your bathroom mirror, you pretty much HAVE to watch it. While showering.  So, I did- for the rest of the stay. It was ridiculous and awesome.

Badass hotel rooms aside, we had a fantastic weekend.

We visited the Pleasure Pier one night. It was tons of fun, and Chris even convinced me to ride the crazy-intense-for-a-boardwalk roller coaster. I think I lost years of my life on that thing. He won me a stuffed giraffe playing Whack-a-Mole, and I stuffed it into one of the cannons outside of the pirate's plunge ride. I figured if it was still there later, I'd take it home. When we went back after several hilarious rounds of bumper cars, it was gone.

We also spent an afternoon at Moody Gardens, checking out both the aquarium and the rainforest. The penguins were a hit.

One night we headed down to the pool, and discovered that the USMC in Galveston was having their birthday ball at the hotel. If we would have known, I would have brought a gown and we could have crashed it since Chris had his blues with him.

Instead, we grabbed some drinks and beelined towards the hot tub, since it was cold that night. It turned out there were several really nice, really cool people soaking up the heat. We recognized one couple because we shared a row of seats with them on the boardwalk roller coaster of doom. The other couple was there for their daughter's dance competition, and were actually from Sugar Land. Small world, huh? So we chatted for a while. I love meeting cool people on vacation, especially in the hot tub. Nothing more awkward than just sitting there not talking.

At one point Chris and I braved the cold night air to try out the water slide, which is NOT heated like the main pool. After an exhilarating, freezing ride down the slide and the shocking dunk into the unheated pool, we ran back to the hot tub and stayed there for the rest of the night.

Sunday we checked out the flight museum, headed back home, discovered that Chris ordered his ring WAY too big, and hung out with some of the family members that had traveled here for the wedding. Oh, and ordered another ring for Chris.

After an evening full of champagne and good times, it was time for bed.

Because the next day would change my life forever.

15 November 2012


It might not be my fault that I can't stand it!
For the record, I don't think it's soapy or buggy, though.

14 November 2012

hey guys

My stomach kinda hurts, but damn this wine is so good. I'm going to keep drinking it.

Tomorrow is my last day at work. Today they got me a cake and a gift certificate for my manicure, so I can use it before my wedding. It was one of those, "Awww" moments. I have some really sweet coworkers, and I'm really going to miss some of them.

Moving right along. I have a list of shit a mile long that I need to do tomorrow afternoon, and I hope I can get it all done-- and still make the book signing I've been wanting to go to.

Maybe I'll just stay up late and get everything done here tonight, that way tomorrow afternoon is free to run errands. But then I'll be tired tomorrow. Merh. Ooh, I almost forgot to refill my prescription before my insurance runs out.

Ok, I'm going to figure out what I'm going to do... and do it.

13 November 2012


By the way, this is my nephew, just chillen out in my sister's belly. Gah, the widdwe feets!
I can't wait to hold them for real.


Today I was pulling up to the gas pump at a crowded station when someone swooped in and stole my spot. I gave him a "COME ON!" gesture and he just shrugged. That's when I realized that he was Santa Claus. Or, he looked just like him.

Needless to say, I went to another pump and let Santa have it.

12 November 2012

making merry

My mom keeps drunkenly inviting people to our tiny little courthouse wedding.

Then, she doesn't even remember doing it. And it's random people, like my brother in law's parents, who don't even like us! And we purposely didn't invite aunts and uncles, because they're loud and obnoxious as a group, and if we invite one we have to invite them all, which is like 50 people. But my dad keeps telling them when & where everything is and I just know they're going to crash it.

So after Ashley brought this most recent addition to my attention, I asked mom about it. She laughed and said she'd forgotten she invited them, and said that she'd call and tell them she was mistaken; we really don't have any room to add people. Wow, how offensive are we to have to un-invite someone!

I wonder who she's invited that she doesn't remember-- and what random-ass people are going to show up-- to our tiny little intimate courthouse wedding. If we were having a big wedding, I wouldn't mind so much. That's what big weddings are for, so everyone and their mom, (and my mom's friends) can come. The more the merrier!

I really don't want to be that tacky group making a scene in the quiet little courthouse. I know we'll do that anyway, because my family is loud on a normal day, but I'm slightly dreading it because I just know it's going to get out of hand. Everyone's on their best behavior until there's something to celebrate, then all hell breaks loose. We're not known for knowing how to throw a great party for nothing!

10 November 2012

lucky party girl

It looks like a lingerie store exploded in here. Once again I'm bowled over by the generosity of these amazing people that I call my friends.

Seriously, I've wondered it before, and I'm wondering it again. How do I deserve to be surrounded by these wonderful people? I can't wait until my work schedule changes and I have time to be a better friend again. That's one of the things I'm looking forward to the most.

Although I feel like further elaboration is not necessary, last night was so much fun. Dinner & lingerie shower was a blast. The food was great, the company was better, and damn it my friends looked so cute. We were a good-looking bunch. I loved my light-up "bachelorette" sash and my penis headband, haha.

The strip club was quite the new experience. I just... wow, haha. A whole other culture inside that little building. The men were, of course, muscley and in little underwear. It was pretty much what you'd expect until the point when one of the guys stripped off his suit to reveal a sparkly white speedo with a ginormous bedazzled codpiece. It was at that point when we decided the night was turning weird and it was probably time to leave. I will say this. The men at La Bare know what they're doing. They have complete confidence, which is always hot. Also some of those chicks have NO SHAME. And both Vicky and Akhtar were great sports about it all. I owe them big time. If they ever need help hiding a body, I'm there- no questions asked. That is all I have to say about all of that, haha.

Overall, I had a blast and I got to try something new. I think that was a new experience for us all. And I'm going to sit here and drink my coffee amidst my teddies and bras and tissue paper and think about how lucky I am.

06 November 2012


Make sure you do, too. I don't care who you vote for; just do it.

Got a little more stuff squared away for the new job this afternoon. When I was leaving, the guy who took the picture for my badge said, "Welcome back." I guess my info is still in the system from when I went to school there. (A little hint to where I'll be working, without publicly announcing it on here. You know I try to keep certain details about work confidential.) Oh, that made me smile. It's just... amazing.

I've got a fun weekend planned- bachelorette party and Les Miserables. Then, just another short week until my honey is back home.

Oh, I can't wait to feel like the world is right again. There's this huge chunk of my life missing, and it's the part where he belongs. I think I notice it more now that I'm fixing other things in my life that I'm unhappy with. Missing him doesn't blend in with the funk anymore. It's standing out now. Of course, that probably also has to do with the fact that he's coming home so very soon.

So many good things are happening in such a short amount of time, in rapid succession. I just don't know how to handle the excitement!

04 November 2012

So long, farewell

auf Wiedersehen*, goodBYE.

Speaking of two weeks and no regrets, I have officially submitted my two weeks notice and resignation. Why? To make a long, complicated story short, I received an amazing offer from a world-famous hospital. I have Andrea to thank for it-- and I couldn't be more thankful or lucky. Or excited!

This decision has been a large source of stress in the last few weeks. Sometimes solutions just fall into your lap out of nowhere, and the rest of your life follows- but not without bumps in the road and tons of anxiety.
Things are at a point where they're calming down and I feel like it's safe to mention it because it's really going to happen. (Although at times I feel like it's too good to be true and get paranoid that something will happen to ruin it. Maybe because it was on the downlow for so long, now I feel strange talking about it.)

It has made me feel good when I tell my coworkers and people at the hospital that I'm leaving, and they are all surprised and sorry to hear it.
Quite a few people have told me that they're sorry I'm leaving, because I'm really good at my job and they've enjoyed working with me.
It's good to hear that people noticed-- including my boss. She made a ridiculously generous counter-offer, but at this point it's not worth it. I've been taken advantage of for too long.

Honestly, I don't feel any animosity towards anyone in particular. I'm ready to leave for a variety of reasons. Although this cracked me up:

So, on to bigger and better things. It's been a long time coming. I'm ready to be happier.
Here's to my new life!

*I just love this movie

03 November 2012


I noticed last night that the sink in my bathroom was draining a bit slow. With no drano in the house, I figured I'd try something else. If it didn't work, I'd still have to go to the store to buy drano anyway, so it couldn't hurt.

I dumped some baking soda in the sink, followed by enough vinegar to wash it all down into the drain. Then, I let it sit for as long as it took to boil a pot of water. When it was boiling, I poured it down the drain. It didn't seem to fix the problem, so I squirted some dish soap down there and went to bed.

This morning I repeated the baking soda/ vinegar/ boiling water process, and voila! No more clog. I can now brush my teeth and wash my face without having to look at the scum floating in the sink.

Speaking of scum, now begins the steady two-week process of cleaning this dump before Chris comes home. When I started yesterday, I was disgusted by how much dust is in here. Also, I already have a box full of stuff to donate. Yay de-clutter!

P.S. Did you catch that? Two weeks!

02 November 2012

slumber "party"

Shit has been CRAZY around here. Almost ready to talk about it.

On to last night. I had a sore throat, a fever, and hadn't slept well lately. Sleep-deprivation combined with massive amounts of stress probably contributed to sickness. So I took a leftover tylenol with codeine from the wisdom teeth and went to bed. I slept very soundly.

At about 1am, I felt something touch my hand and immediately shot up. I knew what it was. I turned on the light and sure enough, a huge cockroach on my pillow.

Ohhhh I can't even stand it. I was so horrified. I can't smash roaches, or even get close to them. I usually attack with spray products from a safe distance while squealing and jumping around. Or, even better, yell for my brother or dad. But, at 1 am, I was on my own with my spray bottle of bleach.

So I was forced to watch while it ran around on my pillows. Oh, my GOD, disgusting. Then it went on to my nightstand, walking over my cell phone, glasses, and kindle. When it got to the tissue box, I sprayed it with bleach. Eventually it fell to the floor, where I worked up enough courage to put a cup over it.

I changed my sheets and disinfected the other stuff it touched, trying not to think about how long it had crawled all over me before I woke up out of my drug-induced slumber. Then I called Chris. He asked, "Are you okay? You sound like you're about to cry." And I said, "NO!" I wasn't okay. How could I be okay after something like that???

I talked to him for a minute, then tried to go back to sleep. I kept the light on. Every time I started to doze, I'd feel my hair touch my cheek or something, and start awake. I just couldn't relax wondering where this huge roach had come from, and if it had any friends lurking in the shadows that wanted to join the slumber party.

I'm also wondering why the roach would ignore the disgusting sink full of yummy roach-friendly dishes in the kitchen, and come hang out with poor, sleeping sick me.

But, I texted my dad when I left for work and he came in and treated again. He did not, however, remove the roach from under its cup prison. I called my mom while I was still at work, and she lifted the cup a tiny bit and didn't see it on the floor. We figured it had crawled up in the cup. So she sprayed some poison up in it and set it back down. I made my brother go lift it up when I got home, and there it was, all dead with its nasty legs all sticking up. Both the roach and the cup were disposed of.

One of my worst nightmares, a roach crawling into bed with me, came true. I came out alive, but not unscathed. I don't know how long it will be until I won't be skitzy and paranoid about roaches in my bed now.