So today I went to the dollar store and I was all excited because I got one of those back scrubbers. I've been wanting one for years, but for some reason I was too cheap to throw one in the basket when I was at the store. Well, today, I said to myself, "Self. It's only a DOLLAR." So, I got one, and it was great.
On the other hand, I also bought a pumice stone. It's a pretty nifty gadget, with a brush, pumice stone, a coarse file and a fine file all in one. That's not the bad part. The bad part is what my dumb ass decided to do with it. As I was in the shower happily rubbing down my feet with the pumice stone, I noticed what a remarkable exfoliator it was. So, I proceeded to "exfoliate" several other parts of my body with it. This little part of my ass cheek here, the underside of my arm here, bikini area, my elbows, etc. I got out of the shower feeling pretty clean and smooth.
TOO BAD now I have random little rashes wherever I decided to "exfoliate." Except, of course, on my feet. Those are great.
It feels like I got suburned in small patches and it's all red and irritated. I have giant inflamed polka-dots all over me.
Note to self: Don't do that again!
I'm such a dumbass.
For other laughs directed at other people who are more unfortunate than you are, go here. I love it.
OMG after reading this post's title I was about to link you to the very same website hahahahaha!
ReplyDeleteHere's one for you that I remembered after reading something similar on that site:
Richard and I went to the HMNS one Saturday morning. The lady at the ticket counter asked me if I was here to do an assignment for school. I told her no, and she asked Richard if he was my guardian. =( She even offered me a colorful kid sticker afterward!!
And I was wearing makeup, did something with my hair, and wore something other than tshirt and jeans.
FML.
Woman said I looked no older than 14.
hahaha! you deserved that one!!!!
ReplyDeleteIt's not a rash doofus! The skin is raw where you "exfoliated" layers of LIVE skin!!!! Restrict the rough, course stone to areas where the skin is actually dead and ready to be exfoliated and you'll be fine!
hahahahahahahaha!
Thank you for a link to possibly the best site ever. I tell everyone about it. Keep your chin up, life gets better. By the way, can you eat angel food cake? If so, I'll totally give you that Heath Bar cake recipe.
ReplyDelete