down

I am feeling down.

Yesterday was a long day, and today was tough. I was not feeling well, and didn't really eat anything except a banana at work. Several times I contemplated going home, but I knew I wouldn't feel any better at home than I did at work. So I toughed it out, then went to Akhtar and Elmer's graduation dinner/ceremony thingy. It was really nice. I'm glad I decided to go after all even though I still am not feeling all that great.

I'm tired. I spent all day in front of a computer doing slow, repetitive work pulling names out of a database. We couldn't get the results sorted how we wanted them, so I've got to go through and pick. Maybe I'll play with it tomorrow and see if I can't get it to be a bit more efficient. The thing is, I hate to be perceived as a "slow" worker. I want to get a job done and move on to the next. However, this particular project seems to be moving sooo slow. I work all day and have so little to show for it. I guess it's just me learning how it all works. I bet next time it will move much quicker.

It's also bothering me how I haven't talked to Chris since Tuesday night except for a few seconds. Normally I don't worry about it because it's not like I have to talk to him every single day.

But it's at the end of a tough day that you just want someone to be there, to pick up the phone, to be a comfort. This is probably how I've gotten to the point where I don't turn to people when I'm feeling upset.

So, here you are, blog.